No Day But Today
by Magick Starr
Summary: Complete! Jo battles both the odds and Sam's stubborness to win her heart. The only problem is, when Sam finally admits what she wants, it's too late for Jo. Jam.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: For Lucy; a birthday present of sorts. I'm so sorry it's not finished... But it will be, I promise! A two-parter! Something now and something to look forward to! The song thrown in later at random intervals is 'no day but today' from the musical Rent. Not the usual kind of songfic, a lot longer and the song is much more spread out than ones I've written or read before. Hope you enjoy it and, as always, please leave a review if you like it!

* * *

Jo watched as the lone blonde rushed into the busy CID office, her hair hanging limply down the sides of her face, making a grab for her bag left haphazardly on a spare desk she simultaneously picked up a file and steamed off towards her own office. 

It was a few minutes until she saw the DI re-enter the packed room, a coffee cup in her hand, hair neatly held in place around the back of her head by a fancy clip. Her clothes were also looking a lot smarter than they had previously, her breathing pattern a little less irregular too, Jo noted. Her sense of urgency also appeared to have departed, the woman calmly scanning the CID office, a smile reaching her lips when her eyes rested on Jo herself.

Jo looked down bashfully, not having intended to be caught monitoring her senior officer. Her vision rose, however, when a pair of high heel boots emerged in front of her. Her eyes slowly ascending the taut body currently obscuring the brunette's view of the office, Jo met her friend's striking blue orbs, blushing slightly as Sam smiled. 'Caught you.'

'I was just…' Jo protested defensively, but found herself cut off by the blonde officer.

'Doing no work, I saw.' Sam grinned mischievously, placing a hand on the brunette's shoulder. 'Fancy helping me on a case seeing as you've been sat here doing nothing more productive than playing solitaire for the past twenty minutes?'

'How did you…' Jo began, her eyes flicking to the computer screen, still displaying the game she'd been passing the time with.

'You're not the only one been avoiding your work, Jo, there's a nice view of your computer screen from my office window. I've been staring at your game for the past quarter of an hour, willing you to move…' Sam leant over Jo's shoulder, taking the mouse and dragging a card across the screen, 'That card to there.' She concluded, smiling at the brunette.

'But you just came in and…'

'Attempted to make it look like I was working, yes. But I really do need to get some work done today, so how about it, you and me? Top London restaurant?'

Jo's brow furrowed.

'Nice little assault on the head chef.' Sam added, smiling slightly at Jo's previous expression.

Jo let out a sigh, the brief thought of dinner with Sam at a top restaurant doing nothing for her blood pressure. She rose from her desk, quickly logging off her computer. 'Yeah, why not.'

'Oh thank you, this case has been driving me insane.' Sam admitted.

'Oh you could have told me it was one you couldn't solve.' Jo commented, slightly annoyed at the blonde's deception.

'Well you wouldn't have said yes if I had, would you?' When Jo failed to respond, Sam continued, 'No, didn't think so, and anyway, I haven't even spoken to the victim yet, and it might be fun.'

'Fun?' Jo questioned dubiously.

'Well, we could always charge a lunch there to the Met's credit card, say we were doing a little research of the atmosphere.' Sam suggested daringly, as if to challenge Jo.

'Ah, why not?' Jo replied, putting an arm around Sam's shoulder. 'Ms Nixon, are we undercover?' she asked, imitating a James-Bond-style-voice.

'Why, you know Ms Masters, I think we are.' Sam responded, keeping up the charade Jo had initiated.

'Well then, I see fit to wine you and dine you at the…' she prompted, Sam still not having revealed the identity of the restaurant they were headed.

'The Dog and Duck.' Sam finished for the brunette, ducking slightly as Jo swung her arm around in an attempt to playfully swat the blonde.

'Oi, you said posh London restaurant, not scruffy pub.'

'I was economical with the truth.' Sam stated defensively, standing back up straight when she was certain Jo wasn't going to make another attempt to hit out at her.

'Yeah, well, I'll get you back for that.' Jo warned, raising her eyebrows at Sam.

'Just you try, DC Masters, just you try.' She replied, turning on her heel and leaving the office, giving Jo no other choice but to follow.

Jo groaned slightly to herself as Sam exited the office. She found she spent half her time admiring Sam that she could, and did, control any situation she found herself in, and the other half of her time cursing the blonde when she used the tactics on her. Shaking her head slightly, she smiled, following Sam into the corridor.

* * *

Jo quickly scanned the cosy pub, finding nothing out of place at the bar. Spotting an empty booth at one end, she called Sam over, taking a seat on one side of the table, motioning for her colleague to take one on the other side. Sam graciously took the seat offered, a smile on her face as she sat. 

'Seeing as I got you here under false pretences, can I at least buy you lunch?' She asked earnestly, meeting the brunette's eyes across the table.

'Yeah, why not? We won't be missed for a good couple of hours yet; and I'm due my lunch break. I guess the chef won't be very co-operative in the lunch time rush anyway.'

'Good, well, I'll go get us a couple of menus then. What do you want to drink?' Sam offered, her eyes accentuated by the smile adorning her face, Jo noted.

'Oh, just an orange juice, please.' Jo answered, watching as Sam disappeared towards the bar, ordering the drinks and picking up two menus as she did.

Sam returned to the table a couple of minutes later, placing the drinks on the table and sitting back down before handing Jo a menu, opening the other for herself. Jo took the menu from Sam's hand, eyes running down the options while she took a sip from her drink.

'See anything you fancy?' Sam asked cheekily, removing her jacket to reveal a low cut top.

'Mmm?' Jo was close to spitting out her drink, gulping it down quickly, her eyebrows rocketing.

'On the menu?' Sam asked innocently.

'Oh, right, yeah, er,' Jo stuttered, regaining her composure. 'I think I'll just have a jacket potato, how about you?'

'Yeah, that's what I was going to go for.'

'Right, do you want me to go and order them, then?' Jo offered, standing as she did, leaving Sam little option but to agree.

'Yeah, okay. Er, I'll have it with cheese I think.' She murmured, pulling her gaze away from Jo.

'Okay.' Jo replied, frowning slightly at Sam's avoidance of her eyes, having thought they'd been getting on relatively well. Approaching the bar, Jo sighed, giving herself a moment to regain her usual breathing pattern that had been disturbed ever since Sam removed her jacket. Placing the order, she headed back to the booth, taking her seat opposite Sam once again.

'Everything alright?' She asked hesitantly, the blonde still evading her gaze.

'Mmm, yeah, fine.' Sam replied, looking up briefly to Jo, flashing her a smile.

* * *

Jo broke the awkward silence that had descended on them whilst they'd been eating, reaching over for Sam's plate and putting it on top of her own. 'Well, we better get in the kitchen and speak to the chef, things seem to be dying down in here now, he's probably finished cooking.' 

'Yeah, I guess so.' Sam rose from the table, walking off towards the kitchen before Jo could say anymore.

Jo's brow furrowed, thinking back to the events prior to Sam suddenly tensing up, she couldn't think of anything she'd said or done to offend the blonde, in Jo's mind there was no reason for her abrupt caginess. Sighing to herself, she followed Sam, entering the kitchen a couple of seconds after her superior. The blonde had already sought out the chef in question and by the looks of things had just introduced herself. The brunette joined Sam, flashing her warrant card at the chef, before turning to Sam, allowing her to take the lead on the interview.

Jo took out her notebook, scrawling down the information the man gave, drawing a mental picture of the attacker in her head. 'And would you be prepared to come down to the station and take a look at some mug shots?' Jo interjected.

'Yeah, why not. Just hope this guy gets caught, nasty piece of work.' He commented, bringing his hand up to his face and pointing to his heavily swollen eye to reiterate his point.

'Well we'll do all we can to find him, Mr Cosgrove.' Jo said warmly, closing her notebook.

'Would it be convenient for you to accompany us back to the station now to have a look through then?' Sam asked.

'Yeah, don't see why not, I'll just go check it with me boss.' He provided, heading out of the kitchen and towards the bar area.

Jo turned to Sam, sighing when the blonde turned away, muttering to Jo. 'We should go and have another look at the crime scene, see if we can find this weapon he described.'

'Yeah, it'll probably be discarded somewhere. From the looks of his face I'd say it was a blunt object, maybe a rock or something.' Jo responded.

'Yeah, might be.' Sam replied, pivoting back to face the brunette, opening her mouth. 'Look, I'm sorry I…' she stopped abruptly, hearing the booming voice of the chef re-entering the kitchen, telling them it was fine to go and take a look now.

Jo inwardly groaned at the man's timing, just a minute longer and Sam might have opened up about what happened just before lunch. But as it was the blonde was fast retreating towards the chef, Jo having no option but to follow as the officer led the victim to the car they'd been using.

* * *

Jo sighed indignantly as she re-acquainted herself with the paperwork scattered across her desk. Sifting through the, what appeared to be an, endless pile, she pulled out one near the bottom, groaning as every file that had previously been on top of it fell to the floor. Sinking to the carpet, Jo gathered up a few of the files, placing them on the desk again, looking in front of her when she saw another pair of hands collecting the files. Meeting Sam's eyes, the pair smiled briefly, absorbed in their own private bubble, oblivious to the hustle and bustle of CID surrounding them. 

They were soon snapped out of their trance, however, when Phil stormed past them, the momentum knocking the files from the desk back onto the floor. Both women looked up, irritated, their vision following Phil briefly, who carried on heedless of the disruption he'd just caused to Jo's work. Sam considered saying something, but decided against it, he looked stressed and the last thing Sam needed right now was an argument with him. Looking back to Jo, their gaze met again, smiling slightly to each other as they sighed, reaching for the other files now dispersed across the floor.

Jo looked back down to the carpet, smiling to herself as she watched the two pairs of hands become entwined as they reached around each other, unsuccessfully, to grab another file without getting in the other's way. Brushing her fingers against Sam's, Jo moved one hand free, working on the other as Sam put the file on her desk. Moving out of the entanglement completely, Jo picked up the last few files thrown capriciously across the floor, placing them on her desk as she rose, Sam mirroring her actions and standing facing her.

Jo smiled briefly, locking eyes with her superior before looking away, moving the files on her desk back into an untidy pile. Sam stayed focused on Jo for a second, watching as the stacked brunette sorted through the files, moving them into a scruffy heap. She felt a smile reach her lips, contentedly watching as the brunette ran a hand through her hair before turning back to face Sam.

The blonde quickly pulled herself out of the trance, 'Do you want a hand with any of this?'

'Oh, I'm sure you've got your own paperwork to do, Sam.' Jo remarked, silently wondering not only why the blonde was offering, but also what was going on in her head today. One minute they're happily talking, the next she clams up, now she's offering to help Jo with the most mundane task known to the police; paperwork.

'Not as much as you I haven't.'

'I'm sure you've got more than enough to keep you occupied at work, though. I'll probably end up taking some this home tonight and working through it then.' The brunette commented, absentmindedly running her fingers through her hair again.

'Well, why don't you come over to mine, then, we could do it together.'

Jo's breath hitched at the blonde's slip of the tongue, her hormones working in overdrive, the brunette having to use all her willpower to keep her breathing steady.

'The paperwork that is.' Sam added, embarrassed, blushing slightly as her gaze waved from Jo's.

'Yeah, I guessed you meant that.' Jo said with a chuckle, attempting to alleviate Sam of at least a little of her discomfort. 'I'm sure you've got things much more interesting to do with your evening than my paperwork, though.'

'Er, no not really.' Sam responded with a smile. 'Got the house to myself now Abi and Jared have moved out, you're paperwork might actually prove a welcome distraction.' She admitted.

'Oh, well put it like that and how can I refuse?' Jo said with a smile.

'Good, well, come over about seven if that's okay with you?'

'Yeah, seven's fine.'

'Okay.' Sam paused, her eyes locked with Jo's, time frozen between the two of them. Sam brought herself crashing back down to earth, hurriedly looking away. 'Well, I better get back to wrapping up that assault case. Thanks by the way, you were a great help.'

'Oh no problem,' Jo responded, shaking her head slightly as if to reiterate the fact it was nothing. 'Any time.'

'Yeah well thanks anyway. I'd probably still be trying to solve it without your help, never mind about to finish the paperwork and bail the attacker.' She commented, raising her eyebrows slightly.

'No trouble at all.' Jo concluded, sitting down at her desk as Sam scuttled back off to her office.

* * *

Flopping back into the chair, Sam let her head drop into her hands, letting out a brief sigh. Her mind was spinning from the earlier events. She couldn't work out what was going around in her own head, and Sam despised that. Previously, she'd always felt she had an element of control over her mind and what went on in it, to suddenly be thrown into turmoil and have no idea what these thoughts and feeling were or meant, was something Sam detested. 

Her mind was constantly on Jo, what she was doing, where she was, how she was. She couldn't get the bubbly brunette detective out of her thoughts, and she didn't know why. No, that was a lie, she had an idea why, but she denied it unconditionally. She'd only ever allowed herself to be affected in this way once before, by Phil Hunter. But those feelings were on a much smaller scale, and Sam persuaded herself that what she felt for Jo had another explanation. She considered the brunette as a friend, but she couldn't accept that she valued her any more than that. Inviting Jo around to her house that evening was a way of proving it to herself.

* * *

Jo sunk back into her chair, her mind wandering as she opened a file and attempted to sift through the statements stuffed haphazardly into the brown card. Scanning over them, Jo found her brain taking in very little, if any, of the account, her thoughts constantly reverting back to Sam. Everything she read seemed to connect to the blonde in it's own little way, in Jo's mind that was, anyone else reading the flimsy paper would think nothing of it, but even the slightest similarity and Jo's brain was on a completely different chain of thoughts again. Her most frequent distraction was the swift transformations in Sam today. Their conversations had been snatched, but all the same, Jo was certainly aware of a change in the fiery blonde, her mood and approach to the brunette appearing to alter during every brief discussion they'd had. 

She could explain why she was a little edgy around the woman, everything the blonde had said today seemed to lead Jo's trail of thoughts down a sexual route, something Jo found habitually around the blonde, but more so today. It was almost as if Sam had the same things on her mind, leading to her turn of phrase and occasional slips of the tongue. But Jo eradicated that possibility from her mind almost instantly, yes, Sam was a friend, and yes, they'd shared some laughs, but that was all Sam would ever be, a friend. The woman was far too straight to be interested in Jo. But then again, as the brunette had discovered previously, you never can judge a book by its cover.

Her mind straying back, Jo thought over the day once again, only this time with the possibility of Sam not being as straight as previously thought. With all that had happened, Jo entertained the idea for a little longer, the detective was unquestionably different around the brunette, but was an attraction really a possibility, Jo contemplated. After replaying the day again, Jo decided that Sam could well be, albeit reluctantly, a victim of fatal attraction. Some of the things she'd said, and reactions she'd shown gave Jo the feeling that, although Sam masqueraded as perfectly straight, there was a potential for her to have feelings for Jo, however unwanted the blonde may consider them.

Having years ago gone through the same thing Jo thought Sam could be going through now, she knew that right now Sam was probably denying the chance that she could have feelings for another woman, that was something that, for Sam to be happy in herself, would have to change. Even if nothing happened between herself and the blonde, Jo knew from experience that lying to yourself ends only in your own heartache, there was no escaping it.

* * *

Jo tapped on the wooden door, admiring the work done to the small garden Sam had outside her front door, the plants, although scarce, well maintained. Staring up briefly to the moon illuminating the night sky, Jo let out a contented sigh, smiling to herself as she heard what might be the very last cry of a bird that day. 

Bringing her vision back down, she heard the door being opened from the other side, a casually dressed Sam standing on the doorstep, an appearance Jo had not previously been exposed to. Her hair had just been blow-dried from what Jo could tell, probably after a shower, a few wispy strands betraying the otherwise straightened, sophisticated style. She had on a pair of scruffy, pale jeans, ripped slightly at the knees with a fluffy white jumper, probably thrown over the top of a t-shirt or something to keep her warm in the temperamental spring weather.

Jo smiled as her eyes met Sam's, offering the bottle of red wine in her hand, 'Hi.'

'Hi.' Sam replied, a smile on her face that, for the first time in years, completely overtook her occasionally harsh eyes. Her vision was eyeing Jo up and down, the brunette having changed from work. She was now wearing, as a pose to her trademark blouse and sleeveless jumper, a low cut top with a pair of black combats. 'Oh, er thanks. Come in, I'll go get a couple of glasses.'

'I'll just grab the files out of my boot.' Jo responded, Sam suddenly remembering the reason Jo was here in the first place. Jo smiled slightly as Sam nodded, heading back into the house, leaving the door open for Jo to return with the papers.

* * *

'Case closed.' Sam slurred, the alcohol finally getting the better of her, the blonde missing the table as she leaned forward in an attempted to put the file down, the papers floating to the floor. 'Oops.' She giggled slightly, flopping to the floor to gather up the loose sheets. 

Jo, who was perhaps a little less affected by the alcohol than Sam, having spent most of her teenage years giving her body little choice but to adapt to high alcohol levels, joined her on the floor, reaching for the statements and notes at the same time Sam did. Their hands accidentally brushing past one another, Sam's gaze rose, Jo looking up simultaneously, as if aware the blonde had done the same. Sam smiled nervously, her hands shaking slightly as their gaze locked.

Jo's breath hitched as their eyes met once again, the atmosphere tensing as their thoughts connected. Sam placed the papers on the table, Jo doing the same with the set in her hands, and crawled forward slightly, closing the gap between the two women. She gingerly reached out, running one finger down Jo's cheek. When Jo failed to cease the contact, determined to let Sam play it her way knowing this must be hard enough for the blonde as it is, Sam grew a little more confident, moving closer still to the brunette. Cupping her face with one hand, the other held loosely by her side, the blonde lent in, slowly pressing her lips to Jo's. She entwined her other hand in Jo's hair when the brunette responded positively to the kiss, Jo wrapping one arm around Sam's waist.

It wasn't until at least thirty seconds later that Sam pulled back, seeming to suddenly sober up. 'Sorry, I er…' she stuttered, turning away from the brunette, standing as she did so.

_The heart may freeze_

'You did nothing wrong.' Jo interjected, watching helplessly as the blonde occupied herself with returning the papers to the file. She wanted to reach out to the blonde, to reassure her, but instinct told her not to, reminding herself of the promise she made to let Sam play this by her own rules, and at her own speed.

'I shouldn't have done that.' Sam whispered, more to herself than to Jo, shaking her head slightly as if disgusted in herself. She put the file down on the table, picking up the wine glasses and bottle, taking them into the kitchen.

Jo had little choice but to follow if she desired to continue speaking with the blonde, assuring herself that she wasn't breaking her own rules, merely bending them slightly. Standing behind Sam in the kitchen, she refrained from speaking for a few seconds, ensuring the blonde was aware of her presence first, not wishing to startle the already on edge woman. When she was confident Sam was conscious of her close proximity, just choosing to ignore it for as long as possible, Jo continued.

'There was nothing you did wrong, Sam.' she persuaded, attempting to relax the confused blonde. She sighed inwardly when Sam refused to turn back to face her, tenderly reaching out to the blonde, placing one hand on her upper arm, gently coaxing her into turning around. When Jo succeeded, and the two women were once again facing each other, Sam reluctantly looked up to Jo again, her heart filled with the same overwhelming desire it was just before she'd kissed the brunette.

Sam looked down to her arm, her brow furrowed as she concentrated on Jo's hand. She bit down softly on her lip, gulping slightly before reaching out with her hand, taking Jo's other one in her own. Letting out a sigh, Sam shut her eyes briefly, a tear entering one as she took a step towards Jo, reaching out to her face once more, running her thumb over the brunette's lips before leaning in for another kiss.

The kiss was slightly longer than the last, Jo guessed, but ended just as abruptly when Sam once again drew back, though this time her gaze unwavering as her eyes sought out Jo's.

_Or it can burn_

Looking up, Jo found that unlike the previous kiss, Sam was still looking to Jo after she pulled back, the brunette smiling slightly as her eyes locked onto Sam's. Reaching out, the brunette ran a hand down Sam's face, pulling back instantly when the blonde flinched.

Sam turned away once again, the brunette silently cursing herself; positive she'd approached the blonde too soon. 'I'm sorry, I can't.' Sam whispered meekly as she rotated back, facing Jo once again.

'Why not, Sam?' Was all the brunette could muster, determined to revert back to her original plan and let the blonde take control.

'I just… can't.' she replied, clenching her eyes shut, shaking her head slightly. 'I'm not ready for this.' She admitted, clamping her jaw tightly shut as she finished, gulping once again. 'I'm sorry.'

'Don't be sorry.' Jo bit her lip softly. 'We can take this slowly, really slowly.' She added, supportively squeezing the blonde's bicep.

_The pain will ease_

Sam shut her eyes again briefly before moving her arm away. 'No, I can't handle this at all.' She shook her head sub-consciously, as if in the throes of an inner struggle with her emotions. 'I don't think I want this.' She murmured, taking a step back, looking slightly fearful, though Jo guessed it was not of her, but of the blonde's own feelings.

'Okay, okay.' Jo responded, taking a step back herself, knowing for certain that if there was one thing she shouldn't do, it was push Sam too far. 'I'll go, if you want.' She offered, obstinate that she'd leave Sam to do whatever she chose.

'No,' Sam replied hurriedly, looking away when Jo met her gaze imploringly, the brunette having no idea where she was with the woman at the moment. 'No, I… I don't think you should drive, not with all the wine you've had.' She smiled slightly, looking to the brunette for a reaction.

'I can get a cab.' Jo suggested, not wanting to stay if the blonde wasn't comfortable with it.

'No, I… I want you to stay, I don't think I can be alone right now.' She admitted timidly, searching the brunette's green orbs for some kind of response.

'Okay, okay, I'll stay.' Jo nodded slightly, smiling a little in an attempt to calm the obviously panicked blonde. She wasn't really sure what was happening, to Jo it felt like she was trying to coax a suicide risk into handing over a knife or something, allowing the other person to take control for fear of what may happen to jeopardise the person's safety.

_If I can learn_

Sam returned the smile, nodding herself as she fought for breath, her heart rate rapid, her mind spinning. 'Thanks.' She mustered, taking a deep breath in. She turned back away, taking the wine glasses from the work surface and sliding them into the warm soapy water she'd run whilst avoiding the brunette when she first entered the kitchen. Taking the cloth in an unsteady hand, she made her best effort to clean the glasses. Gulping, she took the first one, running the cloth around the outside of it, barely noticing as the glass slipped from her grip.

Jo lurched forward, her hand flying into the water, fearing the broken glass had injured the alarmed woman. Her hands searching blindly through the water, she felt her hand brush against Sam's, grabbing onto it when they briefly collided. Taking it firmly in her own, she pulled it out of the bubbles; evident that Sam was too shook up to make any effort at removing it herself. Inspecting the hand, she breathed a sigh of relief when she found no crimson covering on the woman's hand, examining it closer to check there was no cut. 'I thought you'd…'

'No… I'm fine.' Sam replied breathlessly, looking down to their conjoined hands. 'It slipped.' Sam whispered.

'I know.' Jo responded, shaking her head slightly, never even entertaining the chance there was any other possibility. 'You're shaking.' She observed, the blonde's hand still held loosely in her own.

'I just…'

'This is my fault, isn't it? You're this agitated because of what happened between us, aren't you? Because of what I did?' Jo asked tremulously, gulping at the thought she'd turned Sam into such a nervous wreck, a tear falling from her eye as she saw Sam's anxious expression.

'Yes… but not because of you.' Sam answered earnestly, moving her other hand over the brunette's. 'I'm just…'

'You're petrified.' Jo whispered, biting her lip as she looked to Sam's eyes.

'I'm just confused, shocked maybe… but I'm not petrified.' She informed, shaking her head sub-consciously, not sure quite what was flying around in her mind, only aware that whatever she felt for Jo, it wasn't fear.

'But still, you're shaking…' Jo murmured, frowning slightly at the blonde, hating seeing her so distressed.

'I'm fine…'

'I should go.' Jo began, snapping out of the shocked trance she'd been in, making an attempt to move away from the blonde, her retreat stalled as Sam tightened her grip on her hands.

'Don't leave me.' she whispered nervously.

_There is no future_

'I don't know what to do, Sam. I'm not helping by being here.' She responded solemnly, looking away from the blonde, her vision only returning to the woman when she was left with silence.

_There is no past_

When Jo was facing her again, Sam took a step forward, splitting the mess of hands in between them into two firm grips hanging loosely at both their sides. Sam looked up to the brunette, gulping again. She took another step forward, standing close to the tall woman.

_I live this moment as_

Taking one last step forward, Sam let go of Jo's hands, extending her arms as she did, the brunette wrapping her into a tight embrace as Sam stared up at her. The blonde buried her head deep into the brunette's shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably as she gripped tightly onto the taller woman, all her emotions finally released.

_My last_

* * *

Jo wandered into the kitchen, smiling briefly when she saw the blonde seated at the table, lost in her own thoughts. Taking the chair opposite, Jo sat down, placing her empty coffee cup on the table in between them, alerting the woman to her presence. 'Morning.' 

'Morning.' Sam replied, her gaze teetering as she looked to the brunette, memories of the previous evening flooding back to her. 'I'm sorry about last…'

'Don't be.' Jo interjected, meeting the blonde's eyes unwaveringly. 'There's nothing to be sorry for.' She added.

Sam paused, giving her head time to clear quickly, the jumbled up thoughts flying around in her head doing nothing to ease her alcohol induced headache. 'I was drunk. I shouldn't have…'

'I don't think it was just the alcohol that made you do it, Sam.' Jo interrupted, sighing slightly as the blonde tore her gaze away, the younger woman not sure quite how far she could push Sam before the detective clamed up all together.

'I don't know what you mean.' Sam murmured shyly, her eyes dropping to the floor. Denying her feelings not only to Jo, but to herself, reassuring herself that she felt nothing more than friendship for the brunette, but that alcohol clouds judgement. 'It was just the drink, I wouldn't have done that if I were sober.'

'No, I don't believe you would have, but it wouldn't be that you didn't have those feelings, just that you didn't have enough confidence without alcohol in your bloodstream.' Jo stated, hoping to get through to the perplexed blonde.

'No, you're wrong, I don't have those feelings now, and I didn't last night, I just thought I did.' She argued, her voice raising, the anger aimed more at herself than the brunette. 'Thank you for staying with me last night, Jo, I'm sure Abi's old bed wasn't all that comfy, but I want you to go now.' She concluded confidently, Jo's constant conversation doing nothing to cease her confusion, the brunette's words, unwillingly, making more and more sense the longer Sam listened, something the blonde didn't want to happen.

'Okay.' Jo responded admirably, biting down softly on her lip, placing her hand lightly over Sam's, relieved when it wasn't shaken off instantly. 'If you change your mind, I'm going home quickly to change and then I'll be at Sun Hill, maybe it would be best if you took the day off today, shake off that hangover and clear your head.' She added, hoping that for once Sam would pay attention to her.

'No, I'm meant to be in work, so I'll be in work. I guess I'll see you there.' She confirmed, moving her hand out from under Jo's.

'Avoid me there more like.' Jo muttered, walking out of the kitchen. 'Goodbye Sam.' She added, grabbing her bag from the lounge and opening the front door, glancing back over her shoulder, sighing when Sam looked away.

* * *

Jo looked up from her desk; the familiar sounds of the CID doors swinging open a welcome distraction from the mundane chore of sorting out legal representatives for the suspects uniform had brought in. She looked away again, though, when she saw the cause of the disturbance, the blonde DI heading over to Phil's desk. It wasn't until she heard a shrill laughter coming from the other side of the office, that she looked up again, seeing the blonde perched on the male's desk. Sam was laughing shamelessly at what, if Jo knew Phil at all, was probably a sexist joke that any other time the blonde would find offensive, one hand flirtatiously running through her own hair, a flashing the male a sweet, yet dangerous, smile. 

Looking back to her computer screen, Jo attempted to make sense of the document, the screen appearing to be nothing but blurred fuzz as her mind wandered back to Sam, listening intently to her audacious banter. Turning her head back to look at Sam, she sighed, looking away again as the blonde looked to her, flashing her what could only be described as a malicious glare.

* * *

Sam flicked her vision over to the brunette's desk, annoyed to find the woman observing her. Turning her head back to Phil, she smiled again, 'Do you wanna grab a drink later?' She asked, doing her utmost to forget the brunette constantly invading her thoughts. 

'Yeah, that'd be good.' Phil responded with a grin, having spent the past few months chasing Sam to no avail, only to find now that he'd given up on any hope of the two of them rekindling their relationship, Sam was interested in him again.

'Good, well, I should probably be getting back to my work,' she commented, politely excusing herself, 'Meet you outside at the end of the shift?'

'Yeah, cool.' Phil replied, flashing Stuart a look as Sam left for her office, the younger male clenching his teeth as Phil gloated.

* * *

Jo rose from her desk, logging off her computer as she looked to the clock, definitely time for lunch, she thought to herself, the morning seeming to have gone just that bit slower after she heard Sam ask Phil out. 

Pulling her jacket on, she called across the office to Terry, telling him she'd carry on running the checks when she got back from lunch. When the male nodded his head and called goodbye, she left the room, heading towards Jack's office to run something by him before she left. Her journey was halted, however, when she passed Sam's office, looking in briefly to find the blonde sitting at her desk, a few tears escaping her eyes as she attempted to concentrate on the computer.

Knocking, she heard a muffled 'Come in.' from the other side, the blonde not looking up to see who was there. Pushing the door open slightly, she stood in the doorway, watching as Sam looked down, attempting to blink the tears away. When the blonde finally admitted defeat and brought her hand up to her eyes to remove them, she tilted her head up slightly, meeting the brunette's gaze.

'Can I come in?' Jo asked quietly, the blonde appearing to be on the verge of breaking down again. When Sam nodded timidly, Jo shut the door, taking a seat opposite her superior.

The two women remained silent for a while; both lost in the other's eyes, trying to decipher just what the other was thinking. It wasn't until another knock came at the door, that they snapped out of their trance, both turning as Sam called 'Enter.'

Mickey walked in; looking down to a file and filling Sam in on a few developments, not stopping until he saw the seat opposite Sam was already occupied. 'Oh, sorry, did I interrupt something?' He asked, looking from one to the other, both detectives still a little disorientated.

'Oh, er, we were just talking, can I get you to leave the file here and I'll take a look at it later?' Sam suggested.

'Yeah, sure, I'll leave you to it.' he muttered, walking back out of the office, seeming as distracted as Sam and Jo. The two women didn't pick up on it, mind, too much spinning around in their own heads to even begin to think about what was going on in anyone else's.

'Sam…' Jo began, looking imploringly to the blonde detective, the woman doing all she could to avoid Jo's eyes. 'Look at me.'

Sam allowed her vision to rise, her heart missing a beat as she looked to Jo once again. 'Please, Jo, don't do this.' She pleaded, not having a deep enough insight into her own mind at the moment to answer any questions she feared Jo would throw at her.

'Just one thing, Sam, then I'll leave you alone.' Jo requested, hoping she'd gain the blonde's attention for long enough to prevent her from doing something she may regret.

'Go on then, then you leave me be, I don't know what I'm thinking at the moment, Jo, and you keep hassling me isn't helping.' She stated bluntly, hoping the brunette wouldn't attempt to delve too deeply into Sam's already disarrayed mind.

'Okay, don't go out with Phil tonight, please, trust me, it won't do you any good. The longer you avoid feelings, the harder it ge…'

'You've been listening in to my private conversations?' Jo found herself cut off by an irritated blonde, her voice raised as if to reiterate her vexation. 'And then you have the cheek to come here and act all innocent, like you're trying to help me.'

'Sam, it wasn't really what I'd call a private conversation. You were brazen as anything, flirting with him in the middle of CID, that wasn't something you were trying to keep private.' She declared, a slight venom in her voice.

'Jo, if I wanted you to know my private life, I'd tell you, as it was you listened in to a conversation between myself and someone else that didn't involve you in any way whatsoever.' Sam spat malevolently, silently cursing Jo that she was interfering in Sam's emotions.

'It's a bit late for that, Sam. If you kiss me one evening, twice may I add, and then ask out someone else right in front of me the next day, I'd say that concerns me a little.' She retorted, her voice raising as she grew more and more irksome.

'I didn't ask you to stick your nose in my business today, Jo, I've made it very clear to you that last night I was drunk, too drunk, I wasn't in control of my actions and you took advantage of me.' She retorted acrimoniously, tearing her gaze away from the brunette's, having convinced herself that was the truth, finding that the favourable option, the other possibility too alarming to even consider in her eyes.

'Took advantage?' Jo asked, startled, aware that Sam was vulnerable right now, and that she was fighting a losing battle with her emotions by the looks of things, but not aware that she was in such turmoil. Focusing on the blonde, willing her to raise her eyes again, the brunette feared that Sam hadn't intended that as an insult, but as a reality in her head. 'I… I didn't.' she whispered timorously, looking down to her hands, a lump in her throat, a tear escaping her eye. 'I wouldn't… I'm sorry you think that.' She hissed, looking back up to find the blonde watching her, the pain Jo felt mirrored in Sam's eyes. 'I should go.' She murmured, standing up and walking to the door, looking back to find Sam agitated, as if in the midst of a fight with her pathos, wanting to speak out, but fear preventing her. 'Bye Sam.' She whispered as she left, closing the door firmly behind her.

Sam sunk back into her chair, appalled in herself that she could hurt Jo like that. Slamming her fist into the desk drawer, she drew it back instantaneously, flinching slightly in pain as she looked down to her reddened knuckles. Sighing to herself, she tenderly ran a finger over her swollen hand, wincing slightly.

* * *

'You ready?' Sam asked cheerfully, meeting the male outside the station, placing a kiss on his cheek as they greeted each other. 

'Yeah, where we off to?'

'I thought I'd take you to this nice little Italian place, it's a little out of the way but the atmosphere's nice, they serve good food too.' She added as an afterthought, having picked out the place for it's romantic reputation, positive that if her impression of Phil was at all correct, which she hoped it was seeing at she'd dated him briefly, he'd be bragging about it work tomorrow. Which should in turn halt Jo on her quest to uncover the feeling's Sam was certain didn't exist.

* * *

Jo stood in the empty CID office, looking down from the window, watching as Sam planted a kiss on Phil's cheek, confident that Sam was inventing these sudden feelings for Phil in a desperate attempt to mask the truth Jo knew was buried somewhere. 

She observed the couple intently as they disappeared off towards Phil's car, tearing her gaze away when it was finally impossible to pick them out from the shadows covering the car park on the deserted night. With a tear in her eye, something she irritated to find was happening more frequently since Sam begun unintentionally toying with her emotions.

The brunette reached for her bag, throwing a couple of used post-it notes into the bin before turning off her computer, tossing a file and hole-punch into her top drawer and turning the light off, shutting the door and making her way down the stairs. The irksome brunette was surprised to see the inspector still roaming about at the bottom. 'Gina, shouldn't you be getting home?' Jo called, blushing slightly when she realised she'd startled the officer, Gina snapping her head around suddenly, breathing a sigh of relief when she spotted Jo half way down the stairs.

'Yeah, I was planning on leaving in a few minutes. I could say the same about you.' She commented disapprovingly, having many a time thought to herself that the dedicated brunette worked far too many hours.

'I'm just on my way out the door.' She replied, pausing only when she reached the bottom step. 'You don't feel like going for a drink, do you?' she asked with a smile, the thought of returning to her empty house not the most favoured opportunity, knowing her mind would instantly wander to Sam and how much of a fool she was making of herself with Phil.

'Sorry, I can't tonight, I'm meeting up with June, why don't you come along?' She added, sensing the brunette was in need of company.

'Oh, no it's fine, I should probably be getting home anyway, I've got mountains of washing up to do.' She joked, not wanting to intrude on the two women, 'Say hi to June for me though, eh?'

'Yeah, of course.' Gina smiled; pausing slightly as the brunette failed to make any effort at leaving despite her previous statement that she should go home. 'We'll go for a drink another time, yeah?' She offered sincerely.

'Yeah, yeah it'll be good.' Jo replied distractedly, her mind already meandering to the blonde detective that had been constantly on her thoughts for the past twenty-four hours.

'Good.' Gina concluded awkwardly, Jo apparently not noticing the silence that had descended on them. 'Well, I better be going.' She added, taking a step away from Jo, snapping the brunette out of her daze.

'Yeah, I should probably get going an' all. Have a good evening. Bye.'

'Yeah, you too, bye.'

* * *

'I'll have the same, please.' Sam concluded, handing the menu to the waiter, turning back to Phil when the young employee disappeared. 'So, tell me more about Spain.' She prompted. 

'Well, as I said, we were backpacking across the Alps for a good few weeks. And it wasn't until the last day that Rog broke his ankle, and the guys made such a fuss out of it that we ended up with an air ambulance coming to rescue us.' He chuckled slightly, his mind straying back to that holiday, reminding him just how economical with the truth he was being, remembering his hysterical cries that attracted passers by and consequently put them all sixty feet above the mountains in a helicopter.

'Yeah, well, I guess it was a sort of be there moment.' He concluded when he failed to provoke a reaction from the blonde, the officer looking lost in her own thoughts.

'Oh, no it was funny, I'm just… sorry, I was just thinking about a case I was working on earlier.' She lied, her attention fixed on her previous conversation with Jo, the blonde still trying to figure out if she truly believed Jo took advantage of her or not.

'Anything you want to talk about?' Phil offered, reaching out across the table to place his hand on top of Sam's.

'Oh, no it's nothing.' She protested, moving her hand out from underneath his under the pretence of brushing her hair back behind her ear. 'Tell me more about your travelling.'

'Oh well there was his time when we were swimming in the Mediterranean and this massive…' Phil continued, his attention effortlessly swayed back to his past experiences, oblivious to Sam's effort to direct the conversation away from herself.

* * *

Jo relaxed back into her sofa, wine glass in hand, flicking the television on, trawling through the channels before finally settling on a repeat of Eastenders, her mind instantly distracted as she thought back to Sam. Before the brunette could even settle herself long enough to discover which episode she was watching, her mind transported her back to Sam's office earlier that day, the blonde's accusation having never left her thoughts no matter how much attention she attempted to pay to her work. 

Sam's face as she made her allegation had been disturbing her thought pattern ever since, and Jo feared that even if the blonde confessed it wasn't truthful, that image of Sam would forever haunt her. The look in her eyes was what told Jo that the distressed women genuinely believed that was reality; even if concealed somewhere was the knowledge that was a fabrication she'd willingly invented. Jo took another nervous swig from her glass, hoping Sam would admit the truth before Jo herself began to believe she'd taken advantage of a scared, vulnerable woman.

* * *

Phil pushed his plate away from himself slightly, a small amount of chocolate the only evidence of any dessert ever having covered the plate. 'And then the next thing I knew, Mark had been punched square in the jaw by this guy, and he didn't have time to explain that he was a paramedic off duty and had been giving her mouth to mouth when she passed out! But anyway, Mark ended up in hospital, some witnesses told this guy what had actually happened and he turned up at A&E half an hour later with a bunch of flowers for Mark, saying sorry and thanking him profusely!' Phil chortled slightly, his face falling when he looked to Sam, the blonde not having taken in any of his numerous anecdotes. 'Sam, is there somewhere you'd rather be?' 

'What?' Sam asked, looking up when she realised a question had been directed at her, hastily attempting to think back to his dull drones she'd noted in the back of her thoughts. Finding no indication of what he'd asked, she gave an embarrassed smile, prompting him to ask again.

'I said is there somewhere else you'd rather be?'

'Oh, no of course not.'

'Well then is there anything you want to talk to, because you seem a little distracted.'

'Sorry, I've just got a couple of things on my mind.'

'Wanna talk about it?' He offered unequivocally, hoping to put the blonde's mind at ease over whatever it was that was bothering her.

'I can't really, it's… personal.' She murmured, knowing that however much she was worrying about what happened with Jo, it would be unfair of her to share it with Phil.

'Go on,' He prompted, 'I won't tell anyone, I'll just listen.' He added, trying to alleviate the blonde of her troubles that were so obviously concerning her.

'It's just something that's happened between myself and someone else from work, I really shouldn't talk about it.' She added half-heartedly, hoping that Phil would push her a little further, deciding that maybe talking about it may clear her head a little, though still apprehensive that telling Phil would be betraying Jo.

'Go on, it won't go any further, I promise.'

'It's Jo.' Sam expanded, receiving a confused expression from Phil.

'Jo?'

'Yeah. Last night she came over to my place, I invited her over, said I'd help her with some paperwork, she's got a mountain.' She commented, her mind going back to the previous evening once again, her mind still as muddled as ever. 'Well, she brought a bottle of wine, and one glass led to another… which led to another bottle, and well...I was a bit out of it.'

'What about Jo?'

'Well, she'd had the same amount as me, but it didn't seem to affect her as much, I guess she can just handle her drink better than I can. But anyway, I was quite drunk, and when I went to put the file back on the coffee table, I missed and it went all over the floor. So we were gathering it up… and I sort of kissed her.' She admitted as Phil's eyebrows rocketed.

* * *

Jo sighed to herself, picking up her phone, fed up of the constant ring tone, whoever was calling her obviously wasn't planning on giving up anytime soon. 'Jo Masters?' She said, answering the call and holding the phone to her ear, not even bothering to check the caller id. 

'Paul, hey, how's it going?' she asked, her face changing to a smile when she heard the familiar voice on the other end. 'Well I tell you what, you can't leave it this long next time.' She commented, grinning to herself when she listened to his justification. 'Yeah, okay, right, fair enough… yeah, well I want to hear from you more often from now on, okay? Good… Yeah, I'm fine, nope, nothing new… er, no not really. It means just that.' She said defensively, knowing that he was sure to pry further, he just couldn't help himself.

'No, it's just complicated… Look, any other time I would, mate, you know that, but it really isn't fair on her to tell anyone else about it… Please, Paul, just leave it. Alright, okay, she's straight, okay, well she thinks she is… she's confused I guess… leave it, yeah, I can't talk about it, it's not fair on her.' she snapped, her voice becoming irksome at his insistent digging. 'Thanks.' She replied softly, his apologies showing her how ridiculously she was overreacting. 'Yeah, no everything else is going great, you?' Jo sighed to herself as she listened to his reply, the usual story he told her every time he'd lost his job again.

'Well are you in London? Cool, well how about we meet up tomorrow evening then, it'd be good to see you again. Yeah… no, no I'm not trying to get rid of you, I'm just a bit tired, and I think I need a bit of time to sort my head out. Yeah, thanks mate, about half ten tomorrow evening, yeah? Good, right well I'll see you then, then. Good, all right, bye mate.' She concluded cheerfully as she hung up. Placing the phone back on the table, Jo found her thoughts involuntarily returning to Sam.

* * *

'You kissed her?' 

'Yeah.'

'And did she kiss you back?'

'Well, yeah but then I pulled away… it didn't feel right, y'know… something in my brain clicked and I sort of sobered up. I took the wine glasses and the bottle out to the kitchen to wash them up, but Jo followed me. She kept telling me I'd done nothing wrong, then she reached out to my arm and turned me around.' Sam pictured every detail in her head, but shortened down her recollection for Phil. 'Well, I sort of kissed her again… but then I pulled back again. She told me that we could take it really slowly, and all that kind of thing.' She smiled slightly, remembering how caring Jo had been. 'But I told her I didn't think that I wanted that, that I didn't think I wanted to be with her.' Sam paused, trying to figure out why she did what she did next.

'What did she do then?' Phil prompted, fearing the worst.

'She said she'd go home, but I told her she'd had far too much to drink. She offered to get a cab, but I said I didn't want her to go. She stayed the night in Abi's old bed.' Sam added, seeing Phil's mind wandering.

'Okay.'

'Well, then this morning I told her that I'd been too drunk last night to know what I was doing and that I wanted her to go.'

'And did she?'

'Yes, she went home and then the next time I saw her was when she came into my office this lunchtime. I was upset and we sort of had a row, I ended up telling her she took advantage of me.'

'Do you really think she did?' Phil asked. From what he'd heard Jo hadn't done anything wrong, but Sam obviously wasn't sure, her mind probably quite mixed up.

'I don't know.' She admitted shyly, 'I thought she did, when I said it, I really did, but now I'm not sure, it's like part of me wants to think she did because it would make things a whole lot simpler for me, but I really don't know.' She concluded, sighing to herself, detesting the sudden lack of control she had over her temperamental emotions.

'Well, you can always come and speak to me, y'know, if you straighten your head out a bit, or even if you don't, y'know, I'll always listen.' He offered, knowing that his chance with Sam had long passed by, and if Sam could be happy with Jo, when she cleared her mind a little, then he'd like her to have a chance at happiness, after all, she did deserve it.

'Thanks Phil, it means a lot.' She said with a half-smile, truly grateful for his small gesture. She looked to her watch, quite surprised to find it was so late. 'God, it's half eleven.' She commented, 'Sorry, I've got an early start tomorrow, we should probably get going.'

'Yeah, I'm in too, I'll just get the bill.' He added, pulling his wallet out.

'Oh you don't have to, I'll get this.'

'Nonsense, I've had a good evening, I'm not letting you pay.' He replied, Sam knowing she wouldn't change his mind.

'Well, thanks.' She concluded with a smile, standing up as Phil did and pulling her coat on.

* * *

Jo dragged herself up off the sofa, looking to her clock to see it was almost midnight. Yawning, she took her glass into the kitchen, placing it on the table, resolving to wash it in the morning, her body pining for sleep. Ascending the stairs, she sighed to herself, switching off the downstairs light, going into the bathroom quickly to brush her teeth before climbing into bed, enveloping herself in the warm duvet, her body instantly succumbing to the sleep it craved.

* * *

'Sam, get down the Coal Lane estate, we've got an unidentified dead body. Take Jo with you.' He added, knowing Jo was doing paperwork. 

'Jack, I'm sure I can handle it on my own.'

'What's wrong?' He asked, not knowing Sam to refuse working with someone before.

'Nothing, I just thought Jo was swamped with her paperwork.' Sam answered quickly, not wanting to draw unnecessary attention to the friction between herself and Jo at present.

'I'm sure she'll cope. If there's no other reason…' He prompted, not wanting any tensions between his employees, shuddering slightly as he thought back to the difficulties he encountered when Sam and Jo spent every case at each other's throats.

'No, nothing else.'

'Right, well go and grab her and get down there, flat 15, it'll probably be the one swarming with SOCOs he added with a rueful grin.

'Yes, Guv.' She called, walking briskly out of his office, sighing to herself briefly as she closed the door behind herself, not taking too much time to contemplate working with Jo, mind, just long enough to calm her nerves slightly.

* * *

'Here.' Sam extended her arm towards Jo, holding a wallet out. 'Take a look inside.' She prompted. 

'Colin Smith.' Jo read, pulling out a credit card. 'Gavin Hughes.' She added with a sigh, pulling out another. 'Samuel Hartley.' Removing a driver's licence, she added another name to that list, 'Harry Fisher. I think we've got either a dead thief, or a dead conman, Sam.'

'Yeah, I guessed that when I looked through it myself, DC Masters. It'll be difficult identifying this guy by the looks of it. And it's DI Nixon, to you.' She reprimanded sternly.

'Sorry, _Guv_.' Jo emphasised, beginning to become irritated with the blonde's constant changing approaches to her. 'Shall we go take a look at the body, then, we might recognise him from the WADs.'

'Yeah, why not.' Sam concluded a little less curtly, heading out of the room, signalling for Jo to follow her.

* * *

The two detectives waited for the SOCOs to move far enough away for them to get a decent look at the body. When there was finally sufficient space for them, they took a step forward, Sam going first, pausing as a paramedic pulled the sheet from over his face. 'Nope, no one I recognise.' She called over her shoulder, taking a step back as the sheet was put back in respect while Jo moved forward. 

Jo looked down to the body, gasping when she the face was unveiled, her hand moving up to her mouth, the brunette gulping in a desperate attempt to rid her body of the nauseous feeling that had descended on her. Shutting her eyes briefly, she looked back down to the body, turning away abruptly, rushing out the front door and into the garden.

The brunette cautiously re-entered the building about five minutes later, having lost the contents of her stomach to the flowerbed, coming face to face with her superior. 'You know him then?' Sam asked, the venom in her voice having disappeared from earlier, a slight compassion entering it now.

'Yeah, he's a good friend of mine, Paul McGuire. I've known him since college.' Jo replied, staying clear of the room the body was in, her mind haunted by the image of him lying dead on the sofa.

'When was the last time you spoke to him?'

'Last night, he called me up, I finished talking to him at about eleven thirty pm.' She answered automatically, her autopilot kicking in as her brain failed to process she'd never see the man again. The person she'd come to accept her best, and if she was totally honest with herself, only, friend.

'Okay, and what did you talk about?' Sam asked, her tone lightening completely as she saw just how much this was affecting the usually together detective, no matter how hard Jo attempted to hide her emotions.

'Just the usual. I asked how he was, he asked how I was, we chatted for a few minutes, talked about…' Jo paused, the truth being they talked, however briefly, about Sam herself, something Jo could imagine wouldn't go down very well with the fiery blonde. 'Some other stuff, I asked how everything was going, he told me he'd lost his job.' Jo paused briefly to think back, attempting to remember the entire conversation, not wanting to miss any important detail, giving Sam the opportunity to interject.

'He'd lost his job? Could that have made him at all depressed?' Sam approached the subject as lightly as she could, not sure how well the brunette would take the insinuation that he'd taken his own life.

'Paul? Are you kidding? No. He didn't kill himself, he wouldn't have. We arranged to meet this evening, he was his usual cheery self, he wouldn't kill himself.' She repeated, her words beginning to sound more hesitant the longer she spoke, no matter how sure she was that he wouldn't do that.

'If he'd just lost his job he could have been feeling lo…' Sam sighed, Jo's fervent temper causing her to interrupt the blonde.

'Every time he called me he'd lost his job. Now I'm not saying we talked every day, but I'd get a call from him at least once every two months, sometimes he only lasted a week. Now I'm not saying he was bad at his jobs, but he never stayed in any of them, for numerous reasons, but losing his job was nothing new to Paul, if anything he liked the freedom he got from not being tied to a job for long.'

'Okay, so what else did you talk about?' Sam swayed the conversation, knowing Jo too well to push her too far on an idea she didn't, or in this case couldn't, accept.

'Just stuff. I was tired, it'd been a long day at work, I suggested meeting up this evening so I could get some sleep last night, we agreed on a time, as far as I knew I was still meeting him later.' Jo admitted, a tear escaping her watery eyes as she thought back, betraying her strong façade she was attempting to keep.

'What was this, 'stuff' you keep mentioning?' Sam asked, her face softening at Jo's pained expression, 'I need every detail, Jo, I'm sorry to have to pry into your private conversations, but we need to find out what happened to him, you might have been the last person to speak to him.'

'It's not that, it's…'

'I won't judge you, whatever you said, its just work, Jo, it won't affect my opinion of you.' She coaxed, imagining Jo had some embarrassing detail about herself she was withholding.

'Relationships.' Jo admitted timidly, watching agonisingly as Sam tore her vision away, her cheeks turning slightly pink.

'Right, well…'

'I refused to tell him anything, he got frustrated I wouldn't share my love life with him, I got annoyed at his attempts to make me tell him, the conversation got a bit heated but it was fine in the end, he understood and the conversation ended amicably. It wasn't until after that that we arranged to meet up today, so there was no massive row or anything.' Jo added defensively, knowing if they were thought to have argued she would instantly become a suspect.

'Okay, well, if there was nothing else you spoke about…'

'Nope.'

'Then that's all I think.' Sam concluded, turning to the living room again, pausing only when Jo's voice stopped her.

'How did he die?' She asked, her voice meek and childlike, the pain this was causing her evident in her eyes.

'Overdose.' Sam replied, attempting to keep her voice professional, the agonising edge to Jo's eyes causing the blonde to feel just as affected by the situation, her heart tearing in two as she saw Jo hurt. 'They're not sure what he took yet, there's no packaging around him, so he either disposed of it or…' She halted slightly, not sure how Jo would take the latest revelation.

'Or it was illegal.'

'Yeah.' Sam replied, obvious Jo knew that was where she was headed, but the brunette looking like she needed it confirming.

'He wouldn't have had anything illegal, Sam, he might not have been the whitest of white, but he wouldn't have gone that far, he kept to the law, he knew if he didn't I'd arrest him anyway.' She added, a brief smile reaching her face before disappearing again, the fond memories such statements conjured only seeming to hurt her more.

'Arrest him?' Sam queried, unaware of Jo's current pain.

'Yeah, I took him into Manchester police station once when I found him with a stolen toaster, he only got a caution for it but it was a warning to him to not muck around in the law again.'

'It's good you stuck by your convictions.' Sam commented.

'Maybe. But what if he'd been in trouble and didn't think he could come to me about it after that, I mean, I can't think why else someone would want to do this to him.'

'Jo, overdosing, it's not normally a method of mu…'

'He wouldn't have killed himself, Sam, no matter what was happening, I know him well enough to know he wouldn't have done that.' Jo responded sternly, finding it hard to constantly refer to him in the past tense.

'You could be right, Jo, just like I could be right, the sooner you accept that, the easier it'll be if it turns out he…'

'But he wouldn't have, I know he wouldn't, why won't you listen to me?' Jo snapped, her frustration and anger getting the better of her.

'Look, Jo I know that's what you want to think, but you know as well as I do it might not be true.' She raised her hand as she saw Jo's mouth open, the brunette about to interject again, though gracefully shutting it again at Sam's prevention. 'Just hear me out, Jo, then you can have your say. It might not be true,' She continued, pausing briefly to approach the subject tactfully. 'HE might have been killed, and he might have overdosed himself, we can't prove either way until we've investigated it, Jo, get yourself home and have a rest, being here wont do you any good, I'll clear it with the DCI.' She added, waving her hand in a dismissive gesture, signalling for Jo to leave. 'Go home, Jo, I'll talk to you in the morning.'

Jo went to thank Sam, but the blonde's stern expression prevented her, feeling that the compassion Sam was showing stopped in her tone, her icy blue eyes speaking nothing of the consideration her voice had moments earlier. Instead, she simply turned on her heel, throwing a glance back over her shoulder as she took one last look at the place in which her companion died before continuing down the garden path. She climbed into the pool car parked at the end of the road, thinking little for Sam's own method of transport back to the station, conceding that the blonde could take a lift from uniform.

* * *

Jo strode into the busy CID office, taking no notice of the condolences offered to her, everyone having heard of her close connection to Paul, the brunette heading straight towards Sam's office. The time at home yesterday had given her time not only to think over what had happened to Paul, but also what had gone on between herself and the blonde officer. Steaming into the Sam's office, not even doing her the courtesy of knocking, she was taken aback when she found the blonde yet again in tears, quickly wiping them away at Jo's presence. 

Taking a deep breath in, giving herself time to control her emotions, she looked up to Jo. 'I'd prefer you to knock before you enter my office, DC Masters, but given the circumstances from yesterday I'll let it slip this once, I understand you must be under some pressure at present.' She commented professionally, refusing to let her eyes wander too deeply into Jo's, knowing her emotions would be in turmoil once again if she allowed herself to get lost in the warm green orbs.

'I need to talk to you.' Jo declared, dismissing Sam's previous statement immediately.

'Go on then.' Sam authorised, sensing that her denying the request would not prevent Jo from continuing.

'You and me.' She stated, pausing to see Sam's reaction before she proceeded. 'We need to do something. I can't carry on like this and neither can you.'

'Carry on like what?' Sam asked innocently, wondering how long she could play dumb before in began to irritate Jo.

'You know exactly what I mean, Sam.' She declared, the anger in her voice rising.

_Obviously not long. _Sam thought to herself, keeping her opinions to herself as she saw Jo make another move to speak, knowing that interrupting the brunette would only aggravate her.

'Acting like nothing has happened, constantly changing your attitude to me, I can't cope with it.' Jo continued, determined to not allow Sam to thwart her attempts to say what she came to.

'I'm not acting like nothing happened, I know what happened, and so do you, I'm just choosing to not talk about it because I know that it wasn't, and never will be, what I want.' Sam spoke with more confidence in her words then she felt, resolute to not allow Jo an insight into how much this was affecting her.

'You know full well that's a lie, Sam.' Jo found she was fighting a losing battle with her temper, her voice raising slightly as she became vexed by Sam's denial.

'Calm down, Jo, let's talk about this rationally.' Sam pleaded, becoming increasingly worried by Jo's flourishing temper, concerned that Jo would harm not Sam, but herself.

'Don't deny what you feel, Sam, you know deep down that you and me is what's right, denying it will only prolong your heartache.' She persuaded, hoping her words were at least speaking a little sense with the fiery blonde.

'I'm not denying it, Jo, it's not there, you and me, it's not what I want.'

Jo slammed her hand onto the desk, giving up on her attempts at Sam letting her play this at her own speed, certain Sam had feelings for her, Jo knowing she wouldn't push the blonde this far if she wasn't positive of it. 'Yes it is, Sam.' Gulping as the blonde stood and walked around to Jo, now standing opposite the brunette, only a few centimetres separating them, Jo continued. 'You know this is what you want, Sam, deep down, just admit it, we can take things however slow you want.' She offered, taking one of Sam's hands in her own, relieved when it wasn't instantly snatched away.

_There's only us_

'Jo, I can't…' Sam pleaded, her watery eyes meeting Jo's properly for the first time since Jo had entered the office, a renewed flood of arousal surging through both of them, the blonde blinking rapidly in a desperate bit to banish them from her eyes.

'Yes you can, Sam.' Jo convinced, taking Sam's other hand, forcing the blonde to look down to their conjoined digits. 'Just take the gamble, just once, I promise I won't let you down. You and me, it's right, we both know it, just take the risk.' She whispered, not needing to speak any louder on account of their close proximity.

'I… I can't…' Sam murmured, her hands shaking slightly in Jo's grip.

'You can, Sam. Just let go for once, trust me.'

_There's only this_

'I don't know if I can.' The blonde admitted hesitantly, her eyes wavering slightly from Jo's gaze.

Jo released one of Sam's hands from her grasp, surprised at the blonde's attempts to grip onto her. When she finally coaxed the blonde into letting go she raised her hand, placing one finger underneath Sam's chin. Turning her head back to face the brunette at the same time as tilting it up slightly, seeing the blonde's breath hitch as she realised what was coming next. Jo felt relief wash over her as Sam failed to pull away.

Sliding her other arm tenderly around the blonde's waist in an attempt to close the gap between them, no matter how reluctant she was to let go of the blonde's slender hand, Jo lowered her lips slightly, stealing a kiss from the blonde's responsive lips. The blonde returned the kiss positively, her arm slipping around Jo's neck, an unexpected, yet welcome, reaction.

_Forget regret_

It was few moments later, though, that Sam once again withdrew, her eyes tearing away from Jo's, shaking the brunette's arm off of her waist. 'I shouldn't have done that.'

'Sam, don't do this, not again, you know that felt right.' Jo reasoned, her arm tentatively reaching out to Sam's arm, the brunette sighing when she was rebuffed.

'I don't know what to feel, Jo. I don't know, and you telling me isn't helping.' She added firmly, pursing her lips as she saw the pained expression in Jo's eyes.

'I just want to help you, Sam, I know you feel something for me, and you know it too, denying it won't do you any good. Trust me to know from my own experiences, denying it only adds to the pain.'

'I don't know what to feel, Jo, my heart's telling me one thing and my head another, I've always followed my head, being told to do something different, well, it's all new to me, I don't know whether I want to or not. I liked my life straight forward, no emotions clouding my judgement, I don't know what to do.'

'Do what feels right.' Jo encouraged, attempting to revert back to her plan to allow Sam to take control.

'I don't know what feels right, Jo, I don't know. But until I do, I can't keep doing this.' Sam concluded, making a move to pass Jo, finding herself prevented by the obstinate brunette.

'Don't run away, Sam, it'll only lengthen your confusion.'

'I told you, Jo, I can't do this at the moment.' She spoke with more force than before, her arms raising as she sought to pass Jo, making a bid to move Jo out the way, her hands rising to the brunette's shoulders, attempting to side step past the detective. Jo grabbed onto Sam's wrists, preventing her from passing.

'You have to face it sometime, Sam, why delay the inevitable?'

'I can't do this now, Jo, I've told you that, just let me do this at my own speed.' She pleaded, tearing her gaze away from Jo's.

'Look at me, Sam, look me in the eyes and say you don't want me, then I'll leave you be.'

Sam looked back to Jo, gulping as she searched for the words she knew wouldn't come while locking vision with the brunette.

'No, I didn't think you'd be able to. Just trust your emotions for once, Sam, let yourself be loved.'

'I can't.' Sam said with more force, pulling her wrists free from Jo's hold, pushing past the brunette and moving back behind her desk, using it as a shield of sorts.

'Fine, but don't come running to me when you finally decide to trust your heart.' Jo concluded, turning quickly and leaving the office, hearing Sam call her back though refusing to stop at the sound of her name, slamming the door shut behind her, leaning back onto the wall as she broke down into tears out of anyone's eyesight.

Sam was left standing in her office, her attempts at calling Jo back failing, the brunette's words finally talking some sense into her, if a little too late.

_Or life is yours to miss_

* * *

Sam allowed herself to be engulfed by her oversized sofa, her eyelids fluttering shut as she released a sigh, the events from earlier that day having been constantly playing on her mind, her frequent attempts to corner Jo failing.

The blonde officer found herself unable to work out why it had taken Jo giving up on her to make her see sense and realise the northern beauty was what she had always wanted. She hated her mind for taking so long to click into place, but more than that, she hated herself for being the way she had been with the brunette and not trusting her heart from the very beginning.

Looking to her watch, the blonde's mindful attention drifted to the detective in question, wondering to herself what Jo would be doing at this moment it time. Shutting her eyes briefly, she found they sprung open again, an image of Jo popping instantly into her head, showing Sam, if she wasn't already aware of it, how much Jo was in fact affecting her.

* * *

Jo reclined back into her armchair, settling her feet on the footstool, glass of water in one hand, television guide in the other. Taking a sip from the glass, she placed it on the small table next to her, laying the TV guide fully on her lap, opening it up and flicking to the right page. Scanning her eyes over all the channels, she sighed, thinking to herself that it was about time she invested in satellite tv if the choice in front of her was all she was going to get from the regular telly.

Picking up the remote, she decided to put something on, the mundane programmes on offer a welcome change from the blonde regularly invading her thoughts. Although, instantly losing interest in the TV, Jo found her mind's powerful meanderings travelling back to Sam once again.

Despite Jo's best efforts to drag her thoughts back kicking and screaming, she failed miserably, her mind wandering back to their confrontation earlier that day in Sam's office. _Is it okay to call it a confrontation? I mean, there was a kiss, undoubtedly, but the ending was much more confrontation than romantic encounter._ A voice said in Jo's mind, the brunette instantly dismissing it, knowing she had more important things to worry about than how to describe what had happened between them.

She found she had no idea where she was with the fervent blonde, every kiss they shared telling her Sam wanted her, every conversation telling her the opposite. It was only today, when Sam attempted to call her back as she stormed out the office, that Jo started to see a correlation between Sam's actions and words. The yearning in her tone that moment told Jo that Sam truly did want her, but was it too late? So much had been said between them that Jo wasn't sure if she could handle a relationship with the blonde any more.

_No other road_

It was the phone that interrupted Sam's thought pattern, the tinny noise cutting through the silent room, startling the blonde momentarily. Sighing to herself, Sam hauled herself off the sofa she'd settled on, grabbing the cordless phone, a blessing and a curse at times, and taking it back to the settee as she answered it. Inwardly groaning, she responded to the voice on the other end. 'Phil, what do you want?' she asked, maybe a little sharply than she'd intended. 'Yes… no… no… yes…' Sam let out a soft moan, Phil's inhuman ability to beat around the bush getting on her nerves. 'Phil, what is it? Okay, yeah… no… no, Phil will you just get to the point?' She snapped, instantly feeling guilty, knowing her short temper wasn't down to Phil. 'Sorry, I erm, just got a lot going around in my head right now… no, no, thanks Phil but it's nothing you can help with. Oh please tell me that's not why you phoned?' Her eyes rolled involuntarily, wondering how many times she would have to tell Phil something before he got the message. 'Phil, look, you're a nice guy an' all, but that boat's sailed, I had fun with you, it was good while it lasted, but you and me, it's over, it has been for a long time now.' Sam paused, allowing the male his chance at speaking again. 'Phil, I'm sorry, there's someone else… sort of.' She added, not entirely sure what it was between herself and Jo, but confident that even if there was nothing, she still wouldn't want to get back with Phil. 'I'm sorry.' She murmured, the silence on the other end of the phone alarming her slightly. 'No, it's complicated, I can't tell you who.' She replied, his timid voice something she had never encountered before. 'Really, I can't…' Sam waited for a response, biting down softly on her lip as she heard his question. 'Why would you think that? I know all that stuff happened, but, Jo, I mean…' The blonde paused, knowing she could not formulate an honest response for why it would not be Jo. 'Look, Phil, I've got to go, I'll see you at work.' She finished quickly, Phil's digging doing nothing to ease her thoughts, pulling the phone away from her ear, ending the call as she let out a sigh, wondering pointlessly to herself why her love life was always so messy.

* * *

Jo groaned as the phone rang out, the brunette flicking the television off. Strolling over to the phone, she picked it up, answering it before taking it back to the chair, the familiar voice on the other end making her positive it was going to be a long conversation. 'What do you want Phil?' she asked cheerfully, rolling her eyes to herself as the male instantly defended himself, asking why she always assumed he wanted something when he called. 'Because you do, Phil, now what is it?' she laughed slightly to herself, listening as the male sighed before giving in and admitting defeat, spilling his latest find to the brunette. Any other time and Jo would have been irritated at Phil for calling her over Sam's love life, but with it concerning her so closely at the present time, Jo was pleased to find she had a closer insight into it than Sam had allowed her.

'Well did she tell you who?' Jo quizzed, wondering whether she had competition or whether she was right about Sam was starting to come around to the idea of them together. 'What? Why would you think it was me?' Jo forced a laugh, attempting to conceal her feelings from Phil. 'She did what? She told you about… why?' Jo felt a lump form in her throat as she heard the reply. 'Okay, yeah okay I understand, it's just… when Paul asked me about it I wouldn't tell him, I didn't think it was fair on Sam, she obviously didn't feel the same way when she told you.' Jo stated bitterly, her opinion of Sam fast declining, never having thought the blonde would divulge the moments they shared. 'Why did she tell you about this stuff now anyway?' She asked when Phil admitted he didn't have an answer that Jo wanted to hear. 'You wha… oh wait, you asked her out again, didn't you?' Her eyes lit up at this, a grin reaching her lips as she teased the male. 'No, you did, I can tell, and she turned you down, aw Philip!' She coo-ed, taking great pleasure in winding up her colleague. 'I'm sure she loves you really mate.' She teased, grinning as the male began to get frustrated. 'All right, all right, I'll shut up. Okay, right, you really think you're getting away with no one finding out? No way!' She joked; her face falling slightly as Phil used his little nugget of information as blackmail. 'Okay, okay, I won't tell anyone, hand on heart, but you keep that to yourself, yeah? Okay then. Yeah, well goodnight mate, see ya tomorrow.'

Jo grinned to herself as she put the phone down on the table, partly from hearing Sam had someone else - presuming it was her – and partially because thinking of Phil being turned down always brought a smile to her face, his so called 'charm' with the ladies failing him. Though the smirk soon left her face as she thought back to Phil's admission that Sam had told him everything that had happened between them, a feeling of betrayal washing over the brunette.

_No other way_

* * *

Tucking her legs underneath herself, Sam smiled to herself, the fact she'd told Phil she had someone else giving her a little extra confidence, proving that she really was coming around to the idea of a relationship with Jo.

Leaning over the side of the settee, she pressed down on the CD player, turning it on, waiting to see what disk had been left in it. She didn't pay much attention to the song that drifted out, finding the CD to be one of Abi's she'd left behind.

Instead, her thoughts floated back to Jo, the brunette a constant, but strangely welcome, distraction for once. Allowing her eyelids to gently close, she gradually fell asleep, the soft music and thoughts of Jo filling her mind a pleasant aid.

* * *

Jo pulled herself up off the chair, quickly rinsing her glass out and putting it back in the cupboard before ascending the stairs to bed, briefly stopping in the bathroom to brush her teeth. Her eyelids were heavy as she entered her bedroom, the brunette

relieved that she'd changed into her pyjamas a while ago and the only thing now preventing her from sleeping soundly being the fact she was still conscious. As tired as the brunette was, she knew that as long as everything was going on, or not going on as the case may be, with Sam, she'd never get a decent nights sleep, her mind flashing back to the blonde the moment her head hit the pillow.

_No day but today_

* * *

'Sam, new case for you.' The words boomed out from her superior's mouth, startling the blonde as they rang through what had previously been a silent office, Sam not having even noticed Jack open the door, the male placing a file on her desk.

'Guv?'

'Assault on a young woman. Pretty cut and dry, she's claiming it was the husband, husband isn't denying it, witnesses claim they heard shrieks from her crying out the husbands name at the time of the attack.'

'So why have I got it? Can't uniform deal with it?'

'Well, when I said it was cut and dry…'

'What?' Sam questioned, suspicious of Jack's tone.

'Well, there's also half a dozen witnesses and CCTV cameras placing him somewhere else while she was being beaten half to death.'

'Great.' The blonde commented sarcastically, letting out a sigh as she opened the file that had been pushed towards her. 'So what have we got? Drunken friends claiming he was with them and a few grainy images that could have been him or three thousand other men?' Sam asked hopefully, positive it wouldn't be that simple but knowing if it was her job would be a lot easier.

'Wouldn't that be nice?' Jack remarked with a smile. 'I'm afraid not. Six perfectly sober colleagues in his office. We know he doesn't get on splendidly with any of them so I doubt they're covering for him. Plus there are clear shots of him at his desk in the fifteen minutes we know the attack took place in.'

'So what do you want me to do? Find another suspect?'

'I've got Phil and Mickey working on that, what I want you to do is talk to the husband, I'm hoping that you can get through to him and find out why he confessed to an assault he didn't commit.'

'Okay. Is he in custody?'

'Cell five.'

'Free interview rooms?'

'One if you hurry. Number three but I think a couple of uniform are bringing in a suspect for something and are wanting to use it.'

'Gotta love the estate clean up days, haven't you?' Sam commented with a hint of sarcasm. 'You end up in a wrestling match just to get an interview room when you're probably the only one who wants to use one to speak to someone other than a junkie.'

Jack couldn't help but smile at his officer's cynicism. 'Come on, Sam, have a little faith in the system.'

'When all the system does is stop us from catching the real criminals?'

'That's not true, Sam. In all your years of putting people behind bars you should know more than most that what we do gets dangerous people off the streets.'

'But that's not true, though, is it? What we do allows murders to change their names and form relationships that wouldn't have been formed if people knew who they were.' She stated bitterly.

'Are you thinking of Glen Weston by any chance?' he queried, wondering to himself whether it was a good idea or not to bring up her old partner.

'What do you think?' she retorted sarcastically, a deadly tone to her voice as she silently dared him to reprimand her at his peril.

'I'll take that as a yes, then.' He remarked, pausing slightly, wondering how best to continue the conversation. 'The odd thing is that something good did actually come out of a bad relationship.'

'What's that then?' Sam snapped.

'Abi.'

'Yeah, I guess.'

'What's up? Something happened between the two of you?'

'She's moved out, hasn't she?'

'Oh has she? Is that because of the baby?'

'Jared? Yeah. Reckoned she needed to be independent now she's got a kid. She's moved to Manchester.'

'Manchester? That's a long way away.' He commented.

'Yeah, don't I know it. I try to visit her as much as I can, but you know what it's like in this job, it's hard to find the time or the energy.'

'You do go and see her though?'

'Yeah, yeah I make sure I go and see her at least once a month.'

'That's good.' He stated, pausing briefly, wondering how much more she wanted him to ask. 'When was the last time you went and saw her?'

'Last weekend.'

'How's she doing?'

'She's okay, y'know, bit strapped for cash at times but she gets enough between benefits, her job, and me.'

'That's good. What about Jared?'

'He's all right. Had a bit of a cold a couple of weeks ago apparently, but it's cleared up now.'

'Good.'

'If there's not anything else…'

'Sorry, I'll let you get to work.'

'Thanks.'

* * *

'Jo, you're with me.' Phil called as he approached the desk the DC was sitting at, placing two plastic cups on the surface as he stopped and handed her a file.

'Mmm, you do spoil me you know, Philip, cold coffee and more paperwork, what more could a girl ask for?'

'Yeah, all right, cut the sarcasm. Do you want the drink or not?'

Jo pondered on that thought for a moment. 'Ah, I guess it's better than nothing.' She answered with a grin, picking it up to take a sip and surprising herself when she almost burnt her tongue with the liquid. 'Ah, mmm, jeez, what is it with that machine? It does two temperatures: -60° or 340°!'

Phil chuckled, watching with a wry smile as the brunette continued to moan.

'I mean, is it really too much to ask to have a decent drink at work? I'm not asking for champagne or anything, just a drink at a normal temperature that doesn't taste of soggy cardboard.'

'No, I guess not.' He answered half-heartedly, hoping Jo would focus on the case pretty soon as a pose to the in-depth report on the coffee machine that he was currently receiving.

'Because, after all, it must be a proven fact or something that people work better when they're pumped full of caffeine. Especially in this profession. I mean, how are we expected to go out there and chase criminals with our heads pounded because we can't get any decent coffee boost.'

'I think the idea is that we don't come into work hungover and then we don't need to be filled with caffeine to work properly.'

'What makes you think I've got a hangover?' Jo quizzed defensively, slightly insulted that the male believed she would do such a thing, but knowing she couldn't be too offended at the insinuation on account of the fact it was actually true.

'Because the last time you had a rant like this was the day after the Christmas party!'

'I am not having a rant!'

'Jo, you're sitting at a desk, mine in fact,' He stated, slightly confused, only having just noticed that the brunette was positioned at his computer. 'Moaning about a coffee machine that has actually made a hot drink for once.'

'There's hot and then there's suitable for the centre of the Earth.' She commented sarcastically.

'Yeah, well, it'll cool, at least it's not cold coffee, cold coffee is really not a nice thing to have with a hangover.'

'For the last time I'm not hungover!'

'Then why are you sitting at my desk?'

'I didn't like mine.'

'Because it's in the sun?'

'What, I can't have an aversion to light now?'

'Of course you can, but it does make you look like you've got a hangover.'

'Well I'd prefer it if you didn't judge me in the future.'

'I'm not judging you, Jo, no one's judging you, after everything that happened yesterday I completely understand why you got drunk, I'm just saying that if you do you can't be short with colleagues the next day without the boss getting suspicious.'

'You saying Jack's realised?'

'Jo, no offence but even the suspects have noticed. You really would be better off at home.'

'I don't want to go home, I'll be better off here.'

'Better of for who? Look, I really don't mean to offend you but right now I don't want to be relying on you for backup, because you might not be prepared and that could mean curtains for you or me. So go home, get some rest and come back tomorrow with a clear head, I'll tell Jack you've gone home with a bug.'

Jo sighed defeatedly, knowing deep down the male was right. 'If I come back tomorrow and this place is burned down…' She warned with a half-hearted crooked smile, standing as she did.

'I promise I'll be careful! Now go and get some rest.' He instructed, shooing the DC away from his desk.

* * *

'Phil, how's the case going?' Jack called across the office, approaching the desk briskly.

'Not too bad, Guv. I've got two suspects, three witnesses and one alibi that I'm currently checking out.'

'Good. Where's Jo got to?'

'Oh, meant to tell you about that, she went home with a bug thing, apparently it's been going around.'

'Oh, does that explain her hangover this morning then?'

'Don't go too hard on her, Guv.'

'Why shouldn't I if an officer comes into work with a hangover?'

'She's just got a lot going on outside of work at the moment, just give her a bit of leeway, she'll sort it out soon enough and she won't let it affect her work again, I'll make sure of that.'

'A compassionate side to Phil Hunter. It doesn't happen often so I guess I'll let her off this time, but if she ever comes into work with a hangover again…'

'I'll make sure she doesn't.'

'All right. Make sure you see that she doesn't.'

'Thanks Guv.'

* * *

'Jo.'

'What now, Phil?'

'I told you to go home.'

'I left the station.' The brunette replied stubbornly, determined to not let the male control her.

'Technically you're still in the vicinity.'

'I'm in my car.' Jo retorted sarcastically, sighing as Phil got in the passenger seat.

'It's in the station car park.'

'I couldn't go home.' Jo admitted after a long pause.

'Do you want me to drive you?'

'I can drive myself.' The brunette snapped, instantly regretting aiming such a harsh tone at the only person currently looking out for her. 'I just don't want to go back to my house.'

''Do you wanna come over to mine?' The male offered, holding the brunette's gaze for a few seconds.

'I'd still have to go home later.'

'We could stop off at yours first, you could pick up some clothes and spend the night at mine, I've got a spare room.'

'You don't have to do that.'

'No, I know I don't, but I want to. You've been a good friend to me in the past, despite the constant teasing, I don't want you to have to be alone when you need someone to be there for you.'

'I don't _need_ anyone to be here for me.'

'Alright then, when you want someone to be there for you.'

'I don't want to put you out.'

'You wouldn't be.'

'Just the one night?' Jo checked carefully, not wanting to become a permanent feature in Phil Hunter's living room.

'Yeah, just the one, then you can sod off back to your own place!' He joked, smiling to himself as he saw the brunette perk up a bit and resolve.

'Okay, but I'm cooking.' She ordered cautiously.

'I can cook!'

'Not well you can't.'

'We'll get a takeaway, my treat.'

'Thanks.'

'It's only a takeaway.'

'No, I meant for everything.'

'No problem.' He replied warmly, knowing the brunette wouldn't want him to make too big a fuss out of it.

* * *

'Sam, you seen Phil?'

'Erm, no sorry Guv, he was here about an hour ago but I think he got called out or something. He was standing at the window and then he suddenly just left. Sorry.'

'Oh it's not your fault. I was just hoping to check how his case was going.'

'Oh right, well, Jo hasn't been here in a bit, maybe she found something and he went to meet her.' the blonde suggested distractedly, still flicking through the file she'd been reading when Jack entered her office.

'No, she went home. Caught a bit of a bug apparently.'

'She alright?' Sam asked, slightly panicked, instantly regretting her quick reaction as she saw Jack give her a puzzled look.

'Yeah, she should be fine tomorrow. Why you so worried?'

'Well, she's a colleague isn't she? And a friend. Just want to make sure she's okay.'

'Yeah she's fine. Between you and me she was just hungover.'

'Oh. Right, well I'll give her a warning about it tomorrow then.'

'No, leave her. Phil reckons she's got a lot going on at the moment. It was only the once, we've all done it at some point.'

'If you're sure…'

'Yeah, give her a bit of space and she'll pull through it, you know Jo, she's a tough cookie.'

'Yeah. Yeah, it's probably something and nothing.'

Jack allowed the silence to build, not really sure how to continue, guessing that Sam had some idea about what was bothering Jo, but not wanting to push his officer, knowing she wouldn't take kindly to it. 'How's your case going? Spoken to the husband yet?'

'I haven't had a chance. I was going to just grab a quick coffee and then go in and do the interview.'

'Good. Well, let me know if you get a breakthrough with him, won't you?'

'Yeah, sure.'

'Alright, I'll leave you to it then.'

'Thanks, Guv.'

* * *

Sam paused, giving her mind a couple of seconds to straighten itself out before she pressed the 'play' button on the tape recorder, her thoughts currently still, however reluctantly, tangled up in her reflections of what happened between herself and Jo. Taking in a deep breath, she pressed down on the button, formally beginning the interview with the list of those present before taking a seat opposite the male.

'Right, Mr Smith, can you tell me exactly what you were doing between 12:30pm and 1:15pm on the afternoon of Monday 29th July?' Sam asked briefly, her mind still preoccupied with Jo.

'No comment.'

'Mr Smith. Is it true that between 12:30pm and 1:15pm on the afternoon of Monday 29th July, you were at the house you share with you wife? Is it also true that you violently assaulted her, an attack in which she sustained numerous injuries resulting in her admittance to St Hughs General where she is still currently residing due to a head injury?'

'No comment.'

'Or is it true that at that time you were still at your desk?'

'No comment.'

'Mr Smith, I know you were at work at the time of the attack, there are statements from your colleagues and numerous CCTV images confirming that, why are you sitting here making yourself looking guilty of a crime it's obvious you didn't commit?'

'No comment.'

Sam took a deep breath in, her temper rising. 'Mr Smith, I want to help you, but if you don't help me out then I won't we able to.'

'I'm not asking for your help.'

'Then what are you asking for? Because carry on like this and the only thing you'll get from us is a prison sentence for perverting the course of justice.' The blonde snapped, hoping that somehow she'd get through to the stubborn male sitting in front of her.

'No comment.'

'Right, in that case you leave me no other choice. Mr Smith, I'm arresting you for perverting the course of justice.' Sam continued to caution the male as she stood him up, formally ending the interview before leading him out of the interview room and into a cell.

* * *

'Jo.'

'Yeah?'

'Phone.'

'For me?' the brunette questioned dubiously, certain no one knew she was staying with the male.

'Yeah.'

'Who is it?'

'Didn't say.' The male lied, knowing he wouldn't get her within ten miles of the phone if he told her who was on the other end.

'Okay, give it here.' Jo relented with a sigh, taking the receiver from his hand. 'Hello?'

'Hi Jo.'

'What do you want?'

'To talk.'

'Go on then.'

'What I said the other day… I didn't mean it.' She admitted hoarsely. 'I care about you. I _really_ care about you.'

_There's only yes_

'I'm sorry, Sam, I meant it yesterday when I said it's too late.'

_Only tonight_

'I love you.' Sam murmured, her voice breaking as Jo's words rung out in her ears.

'I'm sorry. I can't cope with your kind of love.'

'What does that mean?'

'Temperamental. When I'm with you I don't know whether I'm coming, going or completely lost.'

'I'll change that. I'll make it work. It's got to work.'

_We must let go_

'It won't. Not in the end. It'll end in tears and I'd prefer for those to be sooner rather than later.'

'What if they're never at all? We won't know unless we try.'

'I know, Sam, I know it will.'

'Jo please just…' The blonde sighed, sniffing as she heard the phone go dead, brushing a couple of tears from her eye before she put the receiver down.

_To know what's right _

* * *

Sam hauled herself up from the sofa, silently hoping the knock at the door was in fact Jo, mentally calculating that having hung up thirty minutes earlier that would have given the brunette fifteen minutes to contemplate their conversation and then another fifteen to get there. Pulling the chain off the lock, Sam opened the door, a smile reaching her lips when she saw the woman at the door. 'Abi!' So she hadn't exactly been hoping it would be her daughter, but she couldn't deny she was pleased to see her again. 'Come in. What are you doing here? Where's Jared? Are you okay? Is Jared okay?' Sam threw question after question, ushering the younger Nixon into the living room as she did.

'Jared's at Gran's. We're both fine.'

'What are you doing here then?'

'Nice to see you too, Mum.' Abi joked, smiling as she saw her mother blush. 'I'm here because I got a call.'

'A call?'

'Yeah. On the phone. You know, things you can speak to people with… you have one.'

'Yes, thank you, Abi, I know what a phone is. I mean, who called you?'

'Phil.'

'Hunter?'

'Yes. He said you needed someone around and he wasn't the right person. When I asked him what it was about he told me it was up to you to tell me, so…'

'I'm gonna kill him.' Sam exclaimed, shaking her head as she did so. 'I can't believe he told you to come down. You really didn't need to.'

'Tell me what he meant.'

'It's no big deal.' Sam lied, sitting on the arm of the sofa she'd virtually pushed Abi into.

'Then it's fine for you to tell me then, isn't it?'

'Okay… so maybe it's a bit of a big deal.' Sam relented with a sigh. She really did hate the fact Abi had inherited her stubbornness.

'Then I guess maybe you need someone to share it with.'

'It's my problem, Abi, not yours.'

'A problem shared is a problem halved.'

'Don't… I hate that phrase.'

Abi let out a giggle. 'Me too.'

Sam paused, taking in a sharp breath, not entirely sure why she was about to tell Abi what she was going to. There was one thing she was certain about though, she was going to strangle Phil Hunter when she got her hands on him. 'I've mucked up.' she admitted, pausing to wait for a reaction from Abi.

'Mucked up what? Your work?'

'No. Love life.'

'You have a love life?!' Abi asked sarcastically.

'Alright, enough of your cheek.'

'Sorry. What about your love life? Oh God, not Phil again?'

'No, not Phil again.'

'Good. No offence but he was a…'

'Abi.' Sam interrupted sternly. As awful as Phil had been to her in the past, he was a good friend now, and he'd been great about the whole Jo situation, something she never thought she'd see.

'Sorry. So who?'

'Jo.'

'Joe? Joe who?' Abi wracked her brain attempting to think of a Joe. All she could come up with was a female Jo that her mother had done nothing but complain about when she first arrived, so Abi knew she could definitely be crossed off the list.

'Jo Masters.'

Abi's eyebrows rocketed. She'd heard the name Jo Masters enough times to know it was in fact the female her mother despised. 'But she's…'

'Annoying? A complete cow? Yep, you name it I've called her it.'

'Actually I was going to say a woman, but…'

'Yeah, funnily enough I had noticed that.'

'So you've gone dyke?'

'No.'

'Then what?'

'I don't know.' Sam paused, not sure how well Abi would take the next bit. 'I guess I love her.'

'Oh.'

_No other course_

'So are you and her together then?' Abi asked cautiously, wondering whether she'd been roped into coming all this way just to find out the big drama was just that her mother was happy for once.

'No.'

'She not feel the same way?'

'It's complicated.'

'I've come a long way, you might as well tell me.'

'I don't want to trouble you.'

'Mum, you can't just tell me that you've fallen in love with a woman and then pack me off again.'

'I know. It's just… I was a cow to her.'

'That's in the past, though, isn't it? You haven't moaned about her since… well since before she went away undercover.' Abi frowned to herself, realising the signposts must have been there all the time. She didn't even know this woman but she knew quite a lot about her. Brown hair, green eyes, dry sense of humour, went away – to Nottingham, was it? – undercover recently. Came back… not long ago. Yeah, signposts had definitely been there, whether her mother was complaining about her or praising her work on a case one thing was for certain – she never stopped going on about her.

'Yeah, that was all in the past. We made up but…'

'But what?'

'When we first kissed… I was a cow. We were both a bit drunk and the next morning I accused her of taking advantage of me.'

'When you first kissed? There's been more?'

'Yeah… a few times but… I don't know… It wasn't until she told me it was too late for us to be together anyway that I realised I wanted to be with her.'

Abi let out a sigh. 'Why can't you ever just do anything simply, Mum?'

'What does that mean?' Sam snapped.

'You always deny things until it's too late.'

'No I don't.' Sam replied defensively.

'Then what happened with you and this Jo? You spent so long convincing yourself you didn't care about her that she ran a mile. And to be honest, I don't blame her.'

'Oh thanks.'

'I mean it, Mum, you're a handful.'

'Aren't I meant to say that about you, not the other way around?'

'Well it's true. You're temperamental…' Abi was about to begin her list she'd prepared a long time ago when she found herself cut off by her mother.

'Jo called me that earlier.'

_No other way_

'It's true. No one ever knows where they are with you, and trust me, not many people like that. It's taken me 20 years to realise that's the only way it's going to be and I'm not totally happy with that, but I know I've got no choice. I either have you in my life as you are or not at all. Well it looks like you're stuck with me but I can't say the same about Jo. She's seen what you're really like, Mum, and although she was prepared to put up with that for a bit, too much of you changing your mind every ten minutes would drive anyone away.'

Sam sighed. 'You didn't have to be quite so blunt.'

'You have to be cruel to be kind, Mum. If me telling you the truth is the only way I'm going to make sure you get her back and end up happy, or at least a little bit calmer, then I have no choice but to tell you the truth.'

'You want me to be with her?'

'Funnily enough I don't want you to be unhappy all your life, Mum. So although a… woman is a bit… different… if she makes you happy, which she clearly does, then I think you should fight for her.'

Sam gulped back a few tears, pursing her lips before pulling Abi into a hug. 'Thank you,' she whispered, 'That's all I needed to hear.'

_No day but today_

* * *

'Did you talk to her?' Phil asked timidly, having cautiously crept back into the room forty five minutes after her heard what he thought to be the phone, phone book and by the sounds of it Cindy's old porcelain cat thrown across the room.

'For about five minutes.'

'And?'

'And I wish you'd told me it was her.'

'Why, so you could be more prepared?' He asked hopefully, presuming the answer would be far from that.

'No, so I could choose not to even take the phone off you.'

'So I take it you didn't resolve things.'

'No.'

'Was she a bit… again… I mean… did she…' Phil paused briefly to contemplate where he'd left his question, relieved when the brunette jumped in and interrupted him.

'No, she was… she told me she loved me.'

'And you told her…'

'To stuff it.'

'Oh. Can I ask why?'

'She's too much trouble, you know that, Phil. You never know where you are with her and I don't know if I can cope with that.'

'But you love her, right?'

'What's love got to do with it?'

'It's got everything to do with it, Jo. Love… it's a magical feeling… but it only works if it's a two way thing.' He commented bitterly.

'You care about her, don't you?'

'I loved her. But… she didn't feel the same way and that destroyed me. What you two feel for each other… you shouldn't just throw away. She loves you, Jo. And from that flicker in your eyes I see every time I mention her name I'd say you love her too.'

'But is love enough?'

'It's more than enough. You care about each other and your need to make sure the other is okay will see you through whatever life throws at you, and trust me, you'll come out the other side stronger for it.'

Jo sat silently for a few seconds, taking in the words Phil had just uttered to her. 'I never thought I'd hear something so profound out of your mouth, Phil.'

'Yeah, well don't get used to it, eh? And don't tell anyone else… I don't want people thinking I actually care about you two.' His cheeky smile softened the insult somewhat, though Jo felt it still warranted the playful punch she aimed at his upper arm. 'Ow.'

Jo raised her eyebrows at him, pouting slightly before letting the moment pass, a smile reaching her face. 'Thanks, Phil.'

'No problem. Now, get to bed and grab some sleep, you've got work tomorrow and I'm not getting you the day off again!'

'Yeah, yeah it's getting late. Look, thanks for earlier… and thanks for just now… and… well… just thanks.'

'Don't mention it. Just tell me you'll talk to her.'

Jo raised her eyebrows at him dubiously.

'Okay, just tell me you'll think about it, seriously think about it.'

'Yeah, I will.' She replied sincerely, squeezing his shoulder briefly as she got up and opened the door. 'Oh, and I owe you a china cat.' She commented, pointing at a white mess in the corner.

'Don't worry about it. It was Cindy's, she left it when she moved out, I never liked it anyway, you've done me a favour really.'

Jo chuckled slightly, squeezing his should again as she left the room.

* * *

Jo ventured into the CID office, her eyes still yearning to remain shut. Stifling a yawn, she looked to her right, glancing into Sam's office to see the blonde already seated and buried in a file. 'Desk, Jo, talk to her later.' Phil whispered in her ear, steering her towards her desk, knowing full well that interrupting the blonde at work wouldn't do Jo any favours if she were serious about making it up with her.

Jo allowed herself to be virtually pushed into her chair as she blinked a few times, attempting in vein to remove the groggy edge from her vision. Jo let out a moan, looking up pleadingly to Phil. 'Coffee?' she asked hopefully.

'Didn't think you would want to risk another one… not after your disastrous cup yesterday.'

'Yeah, all right, enough of your wise cracks, just get me a coffee. Black.' She called after him as he headed towards the machine, the male knowing better than to argue with the brunette first thing in the morning.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Sorry this took so long, I've been busy! Enjoy.

* * *

Sam slammed her hand on the desk, taking in a sharp breath and shaking her wrist as the effects kicked in, the blonde reaching to her knuckles with the other palm, rubbing them gently in an attempt to ease the pain. 'Hard case?' Neil questioned.

The blonde cursed quietly under her breath, having completely forgotten the male was in the office with her. 'Yeah, can't seem to figure it out.'

'You want a hand?' He offered, causing the blonde to look up sharply, not used to Neil offering anything.

'Erm, yeah, if you've got time that'd be great.'

'Sure.'

After briefly filling Neil in on the facts of the case and dumping the file on his desk in case he wanted any more detail, Sam decided another visit to the husband was in order.

* * *

'Mr Smith, are you aware that perverting the course of justice is a criminal offence and may result in a prison sentence?'

'No comment.'

'Is there anything you're not telling me about your wife's attack?' Sam asked pleadingly, her nerves about to snap as she clung to any hope of a result.

'No comment.'

'Mr Smith, you do realise that if you know anything about the assault that you fail to mention it could result in another attack on your wife?'

'No comment.'

'Mr Smith, do you want your wife to be assaulted again?'

'No of course I don't.' the male snapped, a flicker of pain entering his eyes before the mask going up again.

'So then help me to help her. Please, Mr Smith, I'll be honest with you, I have no idea who did this to your wife and if you don't help me, there is no way I can guarantee her safety.'

'I just want Karen to be safe.' He admitted quietly, no more than a whisper really.

'Tell me who did this and I promise I will do everything in my power to put whoever it is behind bars. It's the only way I can help your wife, Mr Smith, and you know it.'

'If I told you, you wouldn't believe me.'

'Try me.' On seeing his sceptical look she pushed him a little further. 'Trust me, I've seen and heard enough over my years to believe anything.'

'Even if it was something that put a bad name against one of your own?' Sam paused, thinking back to Gabriel Kent.

'Especially if it was something that put a bad name against one of my own.'

'It was a man called Paul McGuire that attacked Karen. They were having an affair.'

'Paul McGuire?' Sam asked incredulously, it seemed either Mr Smith was lying or Jo had seriously mis-judged her friend. 'When was the last time you saw Mr McGuire?' The blonde enquired, knowing this added suspicion to Jo's claims that Paul would never kill himself.

'I've never met the man.' He replied confidently.

'So if I were to show him a photo of you he'd confirm that he had no idea who you are?'

'Yes.'

'There's no chance he could have seen pictures of you around the house?'

'No chance at all.'

'How can you be so certain? Are you telling me there are no photo's of you in your house?'

'No, there are photos.'

'Then how can you guarantee that he hasn't seen them?'

'Because I know he hasn't.'

'Mr Smith, Paul McGuire was found dead in his house yesterday. Now the fact he assaulted your wife puts you in the frame for his murder, and you've been very confident that he'll be unable to identify you… Is there anything else I should know?'

'You're all the same, you lot, anything bad against one of your own and you turn the table and accuse innocent people.'

'Mr Smith, Paul McGuire wasn't a police officer.'

'No, but his friend… something or other Masters… reckoned she could get him out of anything, he did.'

'Mr Smith, I can assure you, I know DC Masters and she would never do such a thing. She's a good, honest police officer.'

'That's no the way Paul McGuire told it…'

'So you have been in contact with the man?'

'No… I… I didn't say that… I just meant…'

'Mr Smith, have you or have you not been in contact with Paul McGuire?'

Mr Smith gave a feeble nod.

'For the tape, please.'

'Yes.'

* * *

'Jo, a word?' Sam asked, turning the female around and pushing her back into her shared office, office wondering for a slight second why the brunette had just been in there, but deciding she had more important matters to deal with at present.

'Have as many as you like, Sam. What is it?'

''Mr Smith has just given me the name of his wife's attacker.'

'Eh?'

'Assault case.' Sam filled in; realising a little too late Jo was not involved in the case. 'Up until now the husband's been the only suspect but we can prove he was somewhere else at the time.'

'So… what's this got to do with me?'

'He's claiming Paul McGuire was having an affair with her and killed her in a fit of rage.'

Jo's eyebrows rose, her shock evident on her face. 'No way, Paul would never… assault? No, that's just not his style. Wasn't his style.' The brunette corrected herself, still not used to talking about him in the past.

'The woman's in intensive care, we don't know if she'd going to make it. it's a serious accusation.'

'That still doesn't mean he'd do something like… wait, you said the husband claims it was Paul?'

'Yes… what does that matter?'

'Well… doesn't it put him in the frame for Paul's murder?'

'Jo, until we get the coroner's report we don't know whether Paul was murdered or…'

'He would never kill himself, Sam.' Jo cut in.

'A few moments ago you were saying he'd never attack anyone.'

'And I stand by that.'

'Why are you so quick to jump to his defence, Jo?'

'He's not exactly around to defend himself, is he? Someone has to protect his name.'

Sam flinched slightly. 'I'm sorry… I should have thought before I said that.'

'I shouldn't have snapped.'

'It's understandable… given the circumstances… Look, why don't you take the rest of the day off?'

'I don't need special treatment, Sam.'

'I'd treat any officer the same given the situation.'

'I'll be fine.'

Sam paused. 'Okay, but if you need anything…'

'I know, I can always ask you.'

'Well just make sure you don't forget it.'

'Thanks, Sam.'

'Anytime.'

* * *

'Jo, concentrate.' Phil ordered, watching the brunette as she ran the same name through the computer for the fourth time.

'I'm sorry, it's just…'

'I know, but right now you're at work and you need to be working.'

'I can't focus. She's constantly on my mind.'

'I know what you're feeling, Jo, but you went home early yesterday because you couldn't get your mind off her, you need to work or you won't have a job.'

'It's not like I'm not trying.'

'I know you're trying, but… well, you need to try a bit harder.'

'Yeah, yeah I guess you're right.'

'For once.'

'I should get this on video… it's not often Phil Hunter is right.' Jo teased.

'Oi!'

'You know it's true, Phil.'

'Is not.'

'It is.'

'It isn't.'

'Alright, it isn't.' Jo patronised, flashing him a smile before returning to her list of suspects she was meant to be running through the database.

* * *

Sam flopped onto her sofa, letting out a sigh as she flicked on the TV; her mind flashing back to the conversation she'd had with Jo in her office earlier, glancing at the teletext before deciding there was nothing on worth watching and turned the television set off again.

The blonde ran a hand through her hair, allowing her eyelids to briefly flutter shut as she prayed simply ignoring what had happened that day would make it go away. The allegation against Jo had been there, she couldn't even contemplate any truth in it for a second, but it had been there all the same, and the thought that someone would even think Jo would act so irresponsibly sickened her.

_I can't control_

* * *

Jo sunk back into her chair, eyes flicking to the now empty DI's office – Neil was out on a case – as she shut the file currently occupying her desk, knowing that she wouldn't be able to concentrate on it while the blonde's words were still playing on her mind. Hell, that was a lie, the blonde's every movement was on her mind. She glanced briefly to the clock on the wall, letting out a sigh of relief as she saw the time was five thirty. Okay so strictly speaking she owed an awful lot of overtime, but tonight wasn't really the night to be putting extra hours in.

Rising from her desk, the brunette took one last glimpse at Sam's office before heading towards the door, pursing her lips as she exited the CID office, still wondering whether or not to visit the blonde after she'd left work early that day. That fact, she'd had to find out through the grapevine, Sam had left early after an argument with Neil and if Jo knew Sam even half as well as she thought she did that argument would have been about Jo's competence.

_My destiny_

* * *

Sam fidgeted once again, finding herself unable to sleep, a certain brunette flying into her mind every second she remained still. Finally resolving that sleep was virtually impossible, she hauled herself up, blinking slightly as she stifled a yawn, her muscles screaming at her to never move again.

After the blonde allowed her eyes to adjust to the fact they were in fact required to see, she found herself instinctively looking to the phone, wondering aimlessly whether or not she was justified to call Jo again. As much as the brunette was disturbing her thought pattern every conscious moment, she wasn't entirely sure if she could take rejection from the northern beauty two nights in a row.

_I trust my soul_

* * *

Jo let out a sigh, putting the phone down once again only to pick it up again, absentmindedly fiddling with the gadget as she thought of the blonde, speculating whether or not to call Sam. The brunette knew only two things were certain: she couldn't stop thinking about the blonde; and she also couldn't stand the rejection once again. Sighing again, she relented, putting the phone back down on the side, positive calling the blonde could wait until tomorrow but her heart may not survive if it didn't wait until the next day.

_My only goal_

* * *

Abi lay back onto her pillow, shutting her eyes only to find images of her mother and another – at present faceless – woman kissing. The thought, however happy her mother appeared, was disturbing her slightly, the young Nixon trying unsuccessfully to rid the images from her mind. It wasn't necessarily the fact that it was a woman her mother was with… Okay, so that was a lie, but the other thing bothering her was that this woman was someone her mother had instantly been completely unable to get along with. Sexuality aside, Abi feared her mother would end up with her heart broken if she embarked on a relationship with someone she struggled to spend twenty minutes with before breaking out into a blazing row. And the fact Phil knew was worrying her, since when did her mother confide in him?

_Is just to be_

* * *

Twitching every few seconds, Sam stood silently on the doorstep, wondering whether the delay was a sign the occupant was out. It was for that reason that, when the door sprung open, Sam jumped slightly, smiling cautiously out of embarrassment and sheer nerves.

'Sam?'

'Hi Jo.'

Jo paused, looking from side to side, wondering whether this was actually happening. She had thought she would be the one that would have to visit the blonde, not the other way around. Deciding the blonde was definitely standing nervously on her doorstep, she took in a deep breath. 'What do you want?'

Sam was thrown, not having expected quite such a hostile approach from the brunette. 'Erm… Can I come in?'

'It's late.'

'I couldn't sleep.'

'I could.' The brunette commented. It was only now that Sam took in Jo's appearance, and realised why it had taken such a length of time for the door to be opened. The brunette was standing just inside her house, wearing a pair of tatty pyjamas and a dressing gown thrown hastily over them, a pair of slippers on her feet.

'You were in bed?'

'Well done, Sherlock.' Jo responded sarcastically, her irritable demeanour caused by her annoyance for the blonde and her tiredness in equal measures.

'Sorry. I, er, didn't mean to wake you. I should go.' She suggested, turning away from the door.

'No, wait.' Jo called automatically, kicking herself as she realised she'd let her guard slip for a split second and would now be forced to come up with a reason for preventing the blonde's departure. 'I mean, you've woken me up now, haven't you? You might as well tell me why, I don't want to be awake at this hour without good reason.'

Sam smiled slightly, seeing straight through Jo's casual invitation, though careful to not show the brunette she could see that. 'I guess you're right, I shouldn't wake you in vain.'

Jo paused, wondering whether she was supposed to invite the blonde in for a coffee… or something less likely to keep herself awake until breakfast… or pick her up and carry her straight to bed. Deciding the former was the safer bet, knowing Sam she was probably only here to borrow a case file or something anyway, the brunette led her into the lounge and offered her a drink.

'Oh, no thanks, I don't want to put you out anymore.'

'It's no trouble.' Jo responded sincerely.

'Oh, er, okay, I'll, er, have a… cup of tea if that's okay.'

'No problem.' Jo replied as she made her way into the kitchen, leaving the blonde siting fidgeting on her sofa.

When Jo ventured back into the living room – the tea had been ready for a good minutes but she needed time to prepare herself to speak to the blonde – she found Sam sitting pulling a loose thread out of the sofa, instantly stilling her hands when she saw Jo remerge. 'Thanks.' She murmured, taking the mug from the brunette's outstretched hand.

Cautiously, Jo sat next the blonde, still unsure of the reason for Sam's presence in her living room at three o'clock in the morning. 'You, er, wanted to talk.' She prompted, blowing slightly on her tea, though she doubted it was necessary after the time it had spent cooling on the kitchen worktop.

'It's just… what happened… between us… when we…' Sam paused, taking a deep breath as she finally managed to string a sentence together. 'I shouldn't have turned you down.' She blurted out, blushing instantly as she looked away from the brunette who almost dropped her cup of tea.

'I was expecting another round of you telling me you were straight.' Jo admitted.

'So was I.' Confessed Sam, never having truly believed she would actually pluck up the courage to say those words to the brunette.

_There's only now_

'So, er, you want to…' Sam mumbled slightly, having hoped the brunette would have taken over by now.

'No.' The brunette responded, her tone possibly a little harsher than she had intended it. 'I mean… I don't think… It's just… I can't.'

'Why?' the blonde asked innocently, not understanding Jo's heart enough to realise why she'd previously hurt the brunette – possibly beyond repair – so much that she was unable to risk another let-down.

'It's just… what you've said… It can't be taken back.'

'I know that.' Sam commented remorsefully.

'And I can't let go of it, either.'

_There's only here_

'Oh.'

'I'm sorry, I never should have let you in.'

'What?'

'It would've been easier… for both of us… had I just left it how it was.'

'It's me that came around, Jo.'

'And it's me that let you come in.'

'I didn't mean it, you know?'

'No, I know you didn't.'

'So couldn't we just…'

'Forget it?'

'Yes.'

_Give in to love_

'No.'

'Oh.'

'I'm sorry.'

'No, it's fi…'

'I should at least explain.'

'You don't have to.'

'I owe you that at least, I'm the one that's pushed you so much.'

'I needed the push.'

'Yeah, well, I still shouldn't have.'

Sam let the silence drag out, wondering whether Jo would break it and explain or whether she'd have to prompt her. Deciding it would have to be the latter, Sam opened her mouth. 'Go on.'

'What you said to me, it hurt me more than words can explain.'

'I'll make it up. I didn't mean it. I'll never do it again.'

'It's not as easy as that. I can't risk that happening again. My heart's been broken enough in my time, what I need now is someone that won't hurt me.'

'I won't.' Sam pleaded.

'You already have.'

'Are you scared of loving me, is that it?'

_Or live in fear_

'I'm scared of losing you.'

'Then let me walk out now and you've already lost me.'

'No, I can't lose what was never mine.'

'I am yours, Jo, I'm no one else's and I don't want to be.'

'You're not mine, Sam. You've hurt me too much as it is. If I let you get closer… Well you'll only hurt me even more.'

'I'd never do that again, Jo.'

'You wouldn't be able to stop yourself.'

_No other path_

'I wouldn't do it again, Jo.'

'I'm sorry.'

'Please…'

'I'm sorry.' Jo concluded, rising from the sofa, giving Sam little choice but to do the same. 'I'll see you at work.' She added, leading the blonde back towards the front door.

'Yeah, see you at work.' Sam replied, blinking tears out of her eyes as the door was closed in front of her.

_No other way_

* * *

Sam stood impatiently, looking around to either side she was forced to realise how strangely similar – yet totally different – this scene actually was. Looking to her watch, she found, as expected, it was eight am. She'd decided to catch the occupant of the house before they left for work. Thinking back, she knew it was only five hours ago that she'd been on the doorstep of a different house, on a different street, in – what felt like – a different lifetime.

She felt the same nerves now as she felt then, but this time they were for different reasons. Her nerves earlier had been caused by the possibility that if she didn't go into the house, she may lose her one chance at happiness. Her nerves now, though, were because if she didn't go into this house, she could possibly lose Jo's reputation for her. Sam knew if she couldn't convince Mr Smith that Jo had been in no way prepared to lie for Paul, the brunette's career would be in tatters. After what she'd put Jo through, this was the least she could do for her.

As the door crept open, Sam let out a breath she wasn't even aware she'd been holding in. When she saw Mr Smith standing in the doorway, she smiled, hoping he'd be as co-operative today as he was in the interview after he'd finally let go of 'no comment'. It was then, a shock, when he attempted to shut the door, his efforts only thwarted as Sam instinctively stuck her foot in the door, having made enough difficult arrests in her time to know how to stop a door being slammed in her face.

'Mr Smith?'

'I don't want to speak to you.'

'Why not?'

'I just don't.'

'What's changed since yesterday?'

'Nothing's changed. I didn't want to speak to you then and I don't now.'

'But you did speak to me yesterday, Mr Smith, please, I'm not asking for much of your time.'

He paused. 'Ten minutes.'

'Thank you.'

* * *

'So… you wanted to talk?' He asked, handing Sam a cup of coffee.

'It's about DC Masters.'

'I said all I needed to about that yesterday.'

'Yes, but I didn't, Mr Smith, trust me, DC Masters is a professional, she would never act in the way you were told she would.'

'And how can I trust you? You're on her side.'

'I'm on the side of what's right, Mr Smith, sometimes that's the system, sometimes it isn't. This time it is.'

'Why are you so desperate to prove she's a good person?'

Sam stuttered, momentarily losing composure as she struggled to formulate a response. 'She's a very valuable officer, it'd be a shame to lose her from the police force, she does a lot of good for a lot of people.'

'Was she friends with Paul McGuire?'

'Yes. They went back years. She hadn't seen him in a while, he may have been a different person from the last time she met up with him.'

'A leopard never changes it's spots.'

'It's possible that Jo made a bad judgement with Paul McGuire on account of their long friendship, but I can assure you, I've never seen her make such a mistake before, I doubt I ever will do. I'm certain she would never cover up for anyone on the wrong side of the law, friend or otherwise. Mr Smith, a long time ago, Jo Masters had Paul arrested for a minor offence, she couldn't let that go unnoticed and she wouldn't with something on the scale you're talking about.'

* * *

Jo's vision drifted over to the DI's office for the fourth time in as many minutes. The blinds were closed but she was still aware of the fact Sam still hadn't arrived for work yet.

Running her hand through her hair, she picked up her mobile once more, flicking through the contact list once again before she got to Sam's number, looking at it for a few seconds and shutting her phone again. The brunette knew if she looked at that number many more times she'd know it off by heart, but she couldn't help constantly flicking back to it.

'Work, Jo.' Phil whispered from behind her. She gave a small smile.

'I know… It's just…'

'She'll be here soon, Jo, and when she does arrive she won't be impressed if she finds you haven't been working.'

'I know, I know, I just can't…'

'Stop thinking about her?' Phil finished. 'Yeah, I know that feeling but… you're at work… lust after her out of office hours!'

'It's not lust, it's…'

'I know. But don't drag it into the office, she won't thank you for it.'

'Yeah… yeah you're right.'

'That's twice in as many days that you've said that, Jo, I'd be careful if I were you, you might start believing I'm right more often!'

'Mmm, wouldn't want that!'

'Oi!'

* * *

'Did you kill Paul, Mr Smith?' Sam asked bluntly, sensing the male was getting restless and hoping that would push him into a confession.

'It's all the same with you bloody people, isn't it? If in doubt make accusations.'

'You haven't denied it.'

'I shouldn't have to.'

'You're a bad liar, Mr Smith.'

'What does that mean?' He snapped.

'You're virtually incapable of it. If someone asks you a question you don't want to answer truthfully you avoid it; you don't deny it, though. Did you kill Paul McGuire?'

'I didn't mean to.' He admitted after a pause.

'Tell me what happened.' Sam coaxed.

'I went around there after I found out about Karen. It was before the police arrested me. I wanted to know why he did it and when he told me it was self defence, I… I don't know, I freaked out I guess. He told me Karen attacked him and he just defended himself but… Karen would never hurt anyone, I know that.'

'What do you mean you freaked out? What did you do to him?'

'Nothing. I didn't do anything.'

'Don't lie, Mr Smith, that's not you.'

'No, I honestly didn't do anything. We were talking…' on seeing Sam's dubious expression he added 'Okay, screaming at each other, but… I didn't lay a finger on him. He was eating something… I don't know… pumpkin seeds I think they were… he just… I don't know… choked or something. He was clutching his throat, I don't think he could breath… I tried to help; honest I did, but… I couldn't do anything. I panicked and I ran… I knew if I stayed… after what had happened I'd be accused. I thought if I just left no one would even know I was there when he died.'

Sam let the silence created by his admission drag out, unsure how quickly she'd be able to approach the idea of him giving a statement – voluntary or otherwise – without him caging up again. After what seemed like about ten minutes, she spoke. 'Mr Smith, I'm going to need you to make a statement.'

'No… n… no I… I can't…. No.'

'I'm afraid you have no choice, Mr Smith, you witnessed a death, we need to take a statement.'

'No, no I'm not giving any statement.'

'Mr Smith, you have to.'

'NO!' He screamed, grabbing an empty beer bottle that had been left on the small table next to his chair - probably from the night before - and smashing it on the table edge. 'Don't you understand?' He asked, waving the bottle dangerously close to Sam's face. 'I can't make any statement, I won't.'

'Okay… okay we can talk about that but… please, Mr Smith, put the bottle down, this isn't you.'

'And what do you know about me? We do things my way, now. I'm in control.'

'Okay, okay, I understand how you're feeling, but… Mr Smith there are people that know I'm here, they'll come looking for me soon and when they see this they'll bring CO19… now Mr Smith they're trained in firearms and they're ordered to use them if an officer is in danger. You put the bottle down now and it'll be much easier.'

'No. No it's too late for that. I need to escape all this.'

'Mr Smith, from what you told me, I don't think you had anything to do with Paul McGuire's death, it sounds like he had an allergic reaction… possibly to nuts. You have no reason for holding me here because you've got nothing to escape from; the only thing you're guilty of is fleeing a scene where someone died because you were scared. Put the bottle down now and I'll put in a good word for you, I know you're not a bad person.'

_No day but today_

* * *

'She should be here by now.' Jo commented, looking to the clock to see that Sam was precisely twenty-seven minutes late for her shift.

'Maybe she just slept in.' Phil suggested.

'Sam? Come on Phil, she's probably awake by five every morning, there's no way she'd be late without a good reason and you know it.'

'Yeah? Well maybe she has got a good reason, ever thought of that?'

'Yeah, and what if that reason means she needs her help and we're just sitting her making excuses for her being late?'

'If she needed help, she'd tell us.'

'Oh come on, Phil, you're meant to be intelligent. If she needs help, she might not be able to tell us that.'

_No day but today_

* * *

Sam shut her eyes, her mind – however involuntarily – flicking to Jo. She knew full well that now really wasn't the time to be thinking of her, things would, hopefully, sort themselves out in time with Jo. The situation she was in now wouldn't just sort itself out – it needed her full attention, and Sam found herself getting frustrated at her inability to keep her thoughts from drifting to the brunette at such an inappropriate time. Deciding that her efforts to rid her mind of Jo were fruitless, Sam conceded that her only chance of using the distraction for the good was to be… economical… with the truth.

'Mr Smith, you'd do anything for Karen, am I right?'

'I'd do everything for her.'

'And the thought of being parted from her… however temporarily…'

'I couldn't that stand that.'

'Well, Mr Smith, I have a girlfriend, that I love very much, and the idea that, if you do what you're talking about here, I may never see her again, never hold her, it's… torturous. It's that idea that's scaring me, not the thought of dying.' Sam paused, watching a flicker of hurt entering his eyes. 'You know that feeling, don't you?'

Shaking his head slightly, he paused. 'No. No I don't know that feeling. And I don't care how you feel.' He replied aggressively, pressing the smashed bottle against the blonde's neck.

_No day but today_

* * *

'What's the case she's working on?' Jo questioned, pulling out a file from Sam's desk as she did so, opening it before Phil had got a chance to answer. 'Murder.' Jo commented, answering her own question. 'No suspects.' She added, letting out a sigh as she flopped into Sam's chair, setting the file on the table, making it easier for her to flick through it. 'Any luck?' she quizzed, looking over to Phil.

'Nope. Switched off now.' He informed, placing his mobile on the desk.

Jo paused, biting her bottom lip as she looked to the male, fear evident in her eyes. 'Someone's got her, haven't they?'

'We don't know that.' Phil pointed out hopefully, he himself feeling deflated at the fact her phone had been turned off since he tried ringing two minutes ago.

'She would have answered the phone if she was okay.' Jo responded bluntly, picking up the landline on Sam's desk as she did so.

'Who you calling?' Phil asked as Jo punched a number in.

'Getting her phone traced. Whoever's turned it off might not have known to take the battery out.' She informed. 'Oh, yes, hello, can I get a phone trace on a mobile number? Yes, it's 07739221675. How long?' She questioned, eyebrows raised. 'Yes, it's important, I wouldn't be calling if it wasn't.'

'How long?' Phil mouthed.

'Twenty minutes.' She mouthed back, letting out a sigh. 'No, I need it in ten at the most.' She spoke back down the phone, starting to sound irritant. 'Right, thank you. Yes, call me back when you get it, and if I haven't had a call in ten I'll be calling you back, and doing whatever possible to lose you your job while I'm at it.' She threatened, hanging up the phone as she did so.

'Jo, you can't get so angry with them.' Phil commented warily.

'Angry? Sam is out there, anything could be happening to her, and you expect me to happily wait twenty minutes for the tracers to find her?'

'You need to let them do their jobs.'

'And I need to do my job and find her. I can't do that if I don't get a phone trace quickly.' She snapped, closing the case file, signalling the conversation was over.

_No day but today_

* * *

Sam breathed heavily, her sheer terror being conveyed clearly in the shakiness of her pattern. 'Please, Mr Smith, think reasonably. You're in no trouble right now. But do this, and… You're gonna be in a lot of trouble. But if you let me go…'

'SHUT UP.' Came a scream from the male, Sam feeling the bottle being pressed harder against her neck, feeling, if she wasn't very much mistaken, a small amount of blood drip seep out.

'Ok, ok, I'm quiet.' She replied, letting out a breath she hadn't even been aware she was holding when she felt some of the pressure released.

* * *

'Okay, they've narrowed the phone signal down to a 5 metre radius.' Jo informed Phil, drawing a square on the map of Sun Hill pinned to the wall as she did so. 'It's somewhere in this area, so now all we have to do is search the file and see if any of the suspects or witnesses live in the area.' Jo picked up the file as she instructed the male, already having divided the sheets into half and begun flicking through one pile when Phil reached forwards and picked up the other pile from the desk.

It wasn't long before Jo, carrying a slightly confused expression, slammed the top sheet of the file onto the desk. '42 Cahlden Street.' She read, turning to the map and pointing at a road on the outskirts of the square she'd drawn.

'I haven't found anywhere in that area so it's the most likely house, whose is it?' He questioned.

'It's where the murder took place. It's Karen and Steve's house.'

Phil paused, wondering for a second how to react, but as Jo rushed out the door it soon became apparent that she wasn't battling with the same worries. 'Let's get down there.' She called as she exited the room.

* * *

'Mr Smith.' Jo yelled, her persistent banging on the front door even starting to irritate Phil. 'Open this door immediately. The house is surrounded.' She informed, shaking off a member of CO19 that had taken hold of her arm in an attempt to remove her from the door she seemed attached to.

'The Met prefers not to kill, Mr Smith, but that is what these officers are trained to do and they will if needs be.' Jo called, turning with a raised hand as the young male attempted to pull her back once again. Stepping in, Phil took hold of her wrist, his firm expression telling Jo that hitting an armed officer was not a good idea.

* * *

Sam's heart skipped a beat at the sound of Jo's voice outside the house. However much she was infuriating Mr Smith, the blonde was still relieved to hear the familiar voice.

'Keep quiet.' He instructed, unlocking the door to the living room and stepping into the hall, venturing towards the door.

'You're not coming in.' He called through it, standing up against it as if hoping that his weight would prevent them from entering if they tried. 'I won't open the door.'

'You think that'll stop us?' Jo yelled, grabbing the heavy metal object off a nearby PC. 'I'll kick the door in if I have to.' She called. Phil couldn't quite work out why she'd need to when she was clutching all she'd need to break the door down without lifting a foot, but when she was in such a furious mood he didn't have the death wish to point it out.

'Do that and your friend in here will be leaving in a wooden box.' Mr Smith called; waving the knife around, hoping the officers would see the shadow through the frosted glass window.

'Okay, so what do we need to do to make sure she's walking out?' Phil questioned, stepping in and pushing Jo out the way slightly, hoping a less threatening approach would calm the man down slightly.

Mr Smith paused. 'I don't want to do to prison.' He called.

Phil wasn't quite sure if that was his terms, or merely his feelings, but either way he felt lying might be the best option. 'And you won't, I promise. As long as you let her go now.'

Jo, having calmed down a little, moved Phil out the way, taking the lead with the negotiation again. 'We just want Sam out safely. No one wants you locked up in a cell, all we're interested in is getting our colleague and friend out in one piece.' She called, taking in deep breaths in attempts to prevent herself from screaming death threats at the male.

The male on the other side of the door paused, considering what he'd just been told carefully. 'No repercussions?' He checked.

'None at all.' Jo lied through gritted teeth, wanting nothing more to tell the male she'd ensure he went down for as long as possible for doing this to Sam.

Sucking in a deep breath, Jo waited for a reply, her heart rate increasing every second that she couldn't hear any movement on the other side of the door. When it finally opened a fraction, the brunette took no hesitance in pushing the door right open, her unexpected force slamming Mr Smith against the wall. Charging in the house, she headed straight for the closed door, allowing Phil the satisfaction of disarming the male, her only goal seeing Sam again.

_No day but today_

Breaking into a run, Jo headed towards the blonde who had by now stood up. wrapping her arms around her friend, she pulled Sam into a hug, not caring about how things had been between them before now, concerned only with holding the blonde, wanting to feel for herself that she was okay and this wasn't all just a hopeful dream.

After what seemed like hours, Jo pulled back, running her hands through Sam's hair. 'Are you okay.'

Sam nodded mutely, not quite sure what to say to the brunette.

'Did he hurt you?' Jo questioned, scanning the blonde with her eyes to see if she could find any obvious cuts and bruises. Her eyes resting on the blonde's neck, she gasped, gulping before hesitantly reaching out and running her finger over the fresh cut.

'It's nothing. I'm fine.' Sam informed in a hushed whisper, her mind reeling, her most prominent thoughts being that the woman who had previously told her it was too late was currently tentatively running one hand over her wound and the other over her body.

Jo pursed her lips, nodding slightly. 'Good.' She commented awkwardly, unsure herself of what else to say to the blonde. Looking into her blue orbs, Jo pressed her lips up against the blonde's, deciding that actions speak much louder than words.

The pair pulled back to the sound of Phil clearing his throat. 'Smith's been put in a car and is about to be taken into Sun Hill.' He informed, looking awkwardly from one woman to the other. 'I take it you two are…'

Jo and Sam looked to each other with a grin, searching into the other's eyes to check their answers would both be the same. 'Yes.' They replied simultaneously, not even turning to Phil to offer their answer, instead continuing to look into the other's eyes.

Phil paused, feeling very out of place in the room. 'Um… Good.' After a pause he added, 'Well, I should be getting back to… Yeah.' he concluded awkwardly before making a sharp exit, Jo and Sam's inability to take their eyes off each other long enough to look at him increasing his likeness to a gooseberry.

Jo grinned when he left the room, leaning back to place a quick peck on Sam's lips. 'Don't ever change, Sam.' she whispered.

Sam smiled. 'I thought you would have told me not to do that again.' She commented with raised eyebrows.

'I'm not stupid enough to think you won't.' Jo replied, running a hand down the blonde's cheek. 'Just tell me where you're gong next time, eh? Don't think the mobile tracers appreciate threats.' She remarked, grinning again at the blonde before hugging her again, leading her out the room by her hand. Determined to get her back to the station, make statements and into bed before lunch.

_No day but today_


End file.
